


Remember Me

by Moon and Stars (CaramelLioness)



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ, Super Junior, Super Junior-M
Genre: Amnesia, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Arranged Marriage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Marriage, Mentioned Super Junior Ensemble, Mpreg, Sad, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-02
Updated: 2019-10-02
Packaged: 2020-11-16 15:42:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 31,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaramelLioness/pseuds/Moon%20and%20Stars
Summary: Choi Siwon and Kim Kibum have been together since young.They've dated for a while.They've been to the same schools.They've been separated too, many times.But after all of that, they ended up being married, and on their way with a child.Both of them are very happy, but what happens...when that happiness...shatters?What happens if all that happiness...faded away?What happens if all that happiness...disappears?Sadly, sadness and devastation falls upon the Sibum couple when 7 month pregnant Kibum gets into a car accident and wakes up from a small coma with no memory of his lover, or his child.How will Siwon take this?How will Siwon make Kibum remember him?And not only that, but will Kibum ever remember Siwon, or will he always have a blur in his memory?WARNING: This fic contains YAOI and MPREG!





	1. Our Little Beginning

As the snow fell from the sky, Kim Kibum was outside of his classroom (his classes had ended already.) Looking above as the white delicate snowdrops fell on his face. He plopped onto the snow (from the ground) and started making snow angels and snowballs. He spotted a kid (who looked a little older than him) sitting on a bench all alone. Being sweet and kind, Kibum invited the kid to play with him. They had a battle of snowball fights, made snow angels and snowmen. Kibum had made a friend on December 1st.

Kibum and his friend, Choi Siwon, had formed a bigger and stronger friendship. They had hung out together and treated each other in a friendly way. As they grew older, their friendship had turned more into a friend to friend relationship, and even more than a brotherly relationship: they had fallen for each other.

Siwon had confessed to Kibum when he was 16 and when the younger was 13. They had started dating afterwards. A misunderstanding appeared in their relationship, but it wasn't long before they had gotten back together after the two sorted everything out and realized the truth.

Sadly, Kibum's parents didn't accept the relationship. His parents had sent him to Incheon to finish off school, leaving his home, his old school, his friends, and his beloved. Kibum had returned to his love by randomly meeting on the streets of Seoul. They were old enough to be together and to not separate, by their choice.

On the second day of being reunited, the couple had secretly bought each other couple rings. Siwon's ring for Kibum had engravings that said, 'I LOVE U, Kibum,' and was silver.

To Siwon's surprise, Kibum had bought a ring. Kibum's ring for Siwon had the engravings, 'I LOVE U, Siwon,' and was golden.

They had ended up doing what they had planned on doing when they bought the rings. Kibum had proposed to Siwon in a shy way since it was rather awkward for him (especially being the feminine type in the relationship.) Siwon had proposed to Kibum too, but not as awkward and shy as much, but they had both ended up saying yes to each other's words.

Siwon and Kibum had decided on not having a big wedding, not even a small wedding at all; the groom in his working suit and the bride in a long white shirt and black jeans.

Sadly, for Siwon and Kibum, not all of their friends had come to the wedding. Once the couple was a 100% sure that they were going to get married and on their so called wedding day, the groom had called the first contact (friend) on his contact book: Hangeng.

Siwon had dialed Hangeng’s number while he was _supposed_ to be working in his office. The talk:

“Hello?” Hangeng answered from the other line of the phone.

“Get the boys, Geng! I’m getting married!” Siwon shouted in happiness and hung up immediately. In reply, though the horse hadn’t given his friend time to respond, Hangeng was only able to get a few friends ready.

Kibum had ended up calling his first friend on his contact list, Leeteuk. The talk:

“Teukie,” He said with a wide grin.

“Yeah Bummie?” Leeteuk answered with a light bright happy like tone.

“Get the others ready,” He had repeated the words that his fiancé had said without knowing. He added, “Siwon and I are getting married!”

“Oh my gosh, really? When?” 

“Now!” Kibum said and squealed happily afterwards.

“WHAT!!!???!!!!”

“See ya! Wonnie will text you guys where to meet us, aniyo~~~!!!” Kibum had hung up after saying bye and got dressed in his wedding outfit; a plan long sleeved white shirt that went to his upper thighs, black skinny jeans, and ankle boots (grabbing the closest shoes he found.)

The couple ended up getting married _in front_ of a church. Afterwards, there was no reception or party, the guests left the newlyweds alone and let the _now _married couple spend their honeymoon—time together.

The Sibum couple had moved in together. The couple had kept the secret of their marriage and meeting and life together from Kibum’s parents. Siwon’s parents knew since they fully _accepted_ the couple.

A week later, after being married, Kibum had found out that he was with child. Siwon and everybody else who accepted the couple couldn’t be any happier.

They—Kibum (after being two to three months) couldn’t stop imagining how it’d be. He had always brought up about the baby to—in _every_ conversation after the first few months of his pregnancy, but no one minded. They were as happy as he was.

Once the couple had announced it to their friends, one of them, Lee Eunhyuk, had become a baby making machine. Lee Donghae, Eunhyuk’s boyfriend (wouldn’t take longer for them to make it official) LOVED children.

Eunhyuk had promised Donghae that they’d _try_ right after Sibum’s child was delivered. Donghae couldn’t wait, so he ended up dragging Eunhyuk out of Sibum’s apartment and ended up going to their place and _sleep_. Donghae had been _tired_ so he wasn’t patient, so they had left immediately.

Some of the other friends of the couple had too thought about having children, but ended up promising each other that they would likely try after Sibum’s and Eunhae’s child was born.

Kibum was now 7 months pregnant. He was in his lover’s and his home. It had been Kibum’s when he had returned back to Seoul, at first. When they were finally wedded together Siwon had actually moved in with him. By their luck, there had been two bedrooms.

Since Kibum was alone at first, he had put boxes with his childhood stuff (he hadn’t taken it from his parents) in the second bedroom. After being married, while Siwon was at work, Kibum had placed all the childhood stuff and the extra stuff in storage. Now, the second bedroom would be used as a nursery for their baby.

Kibum walked into the room with a bright wide smile. They didn’t know and didn’t want to know the gender of their baby, so the nursery was painted white.

Kibum knew they wouldn’t live in the apartment forever; they would need bigger space and their _own_ place, which was the topic that was on Siwon’s mind three weeks ago.

He had tried to talk Kibum about how they should move out of the apartment and get a house.

But Kibum had replied, “We have a room for the baby now. We don’t need a house, _now_. We can get one later, Wonnie. Anyways, you, Hangeng, Yesung, Kangin, Zhou Mi, a VERY-HAPPY-TO-DO-IT Donghae, and a pissed but helpful Kyuhyun just prepared the nursery a month ago.

It looks _amazing_. Anyways, if we thought about moving into a house, the boys would be sad that we didn’t even use the room for a long time and would just make extra work to do.”

Kibum was right. The-Wanting-Kids-Now guy, also known as Donghae, would be devastated if the nursery hadn’t been used. Siwon had agreed with his wife, and didn’t think or speak about the topic until there was a _right_ time to do so.

Kibum felt a bit guilty by rejecting Siwon’s offer, but…he didn’t want his husband to stress out or go too far away from him. Kibum wanted his husband to be there when their child was brought into this world. His parents wouldn’t be there, _ever_.

Kibum snapped out of his thoughts and looked around his baby’s room. He smiled as he eyed the white crib with white little curtains; it was a fancy crib that was given to them by Mr. and Mrs. Choi, Siwon’s parents. Siwon’s parents wanted to have a grandchild and couldn’t wait. There were little white shelves and a white dresser. On top of the dresser was a red velvet colored box.

Kibum walked towards it and opened the box. It was a gift from the couple’s friends, Kim Yesung and Kim Ryeowook. Inside of the box, was a silver puzzled necklace. There were three necklaces. Each necklace had a piece of the heart.

The necklace in the box was the middle piece of the heart. Siwon wore the left piece of the heart every day, while Kibum wore the right piece of the heart. There came a note with the necklaces:

_This puzzled heart is in three pieces; for three people. No matter what, as long as the necklace is on those three, if they’re ever to be separated; they’ll find each other, with their Hearts._

Kibum smiled wider and brighter. He couldn’t wait for his child to be brought into this world. Kibum spotted two little white teddy bears that were on the white chair with a white cushion. He walked out of the room and closed the door.

Outside of the apartment, Ryeowook and Leeteuk were chatting with the neighbor and Heechul was sleeping on the couch with a purple sleeping mask with white letters printed that spelled out: I’mTheF**kinPrincess, with a golden crown on top of the ‘I’ and ‘P.’ 

Kibum eyed his friend, who was sleeping on the couch peacefully and soundly. Hangeng had arrived with his diva lover saying, “He WANTS his _beauty sleep_.” Heechul had only slept for a half an hour and it felt long for Kibum.

Kibum checked his phone since he had felt it vibrate from his pants. Once he opened it, he found out the phone had a new message. It wasn’t long before he pulled up the message and read the text:

Bummie, your Appa and I want to see you. Please come to the park near **our** house and look for us on the benches

\--- Umma

Kibum thought and read the message again and again. Is this an apology? Are they going to beg for his forgiveness? Should he go or reject? He looked down at his bump on his stomach. His parents were the last thing he thought about it.

He had pushed them in the back of his mind, the _past_. Right now, was his present and the life in his stomach and man who wore the golden ring that said, ‘I LOVE U, Siwon,” was his future.

The ring showed, Siwon was his, and he was Siwon’s. They belonged to each other. He didn’t feel like an object, but felt a bit happy and shy knowing that he belonged to the handsome, sweet, and gentlemanly man—the Father to the child he was going to give birth to.

Kibum thought deeply, _Maybe it’s important? I don’t keep in touch with my family. Maybe a family member is dying or is REALLY sick? _

Kibum would go. He wanted to see his parents beg. He wanted to hear them say sorry for not accepting his lover and being rude to him too.

When everyone was gone, he left a note on the counter for Siwon. He realized it was snowing. He smiled. He’d always adore and _love_ the snow.

Kibum decided to take a cab. There was only 20 miles left. A red sports car was simply speeding.

As the taxi cab was about to go straight, the red sports car hit the side of the cab.

Slow motion.

It went so…slow.

It was something that was shocking and appalling at the same time.

It went fast and quick.

The doctors were in the ER room with a patient who was screaming as they repeated, “Push! Push! Just a little harder!” Soft wailing noises came from the room.

A crowd of people ran into the hospital. One of the young men dashed to the desk and asked for a patient who was in labor or had already given birth.

The woman asked, “What gender?”

“Male,” The man answered.

“Name?” She asked.

“Kim Kibum,” The man answered.

She nodded her head, “Room 104, but he’s in with the doctors right now,” She said with a smile.

Before the lady could say anything else, the man was gone. So was the crowd of men.

Siwon and his friends waited and waited. Donghae smiled happily, while his lover glared at him with an annoyed face and an eyebrow that he had raised. Donghae had been working, when Ryeowook immediately ran into his office saying, “The baby is coming!”

Ryeowook was told that from Henry, who actual forgot the _details_. Ryeowook called Donghae just minutes after Henry explained the details. Donghae ignored the details. Thinking they meant how the baby was born or Kibum’s mood swings, or how his water broke.

Donghae didn’t need the details to know that his nephew was going to be born (Leeteuk, being the motherly figure of the group, announced that they were all somewhat related to each other.)

Siwon kept shaking and paced back and forth. Kangin placed his two hands on Siwon’s shoulders and looked into Siwon’s eyes.

“He’ll be okay,” Kangin whispered.

“How do you know? I don’t hear Kibum screaming?” Siwon questioned his friend who seemed to want to calm him down.

“Are you even able to hear his screams?” Ryeowook asked innocently as Yesung had his hand on Ryeowook’s knee. Siwon shot a deadly glare at him. The younger responded by shrieking, scared for his life.

Donghae turned to face directly, “No dur! The screaming is SO loud that I think people from America can hear!” Donghae exaggerated smacking his head stupidly and sticking out his tongue.

“Sorry, just wanted…to know,” Ryeowook whispered as low as a mouse; noticing stares from Siwon. Ryeowook went back to sitting and being quiet.

Everyone was quiet, but Donghae who was jumping in his seat with happiness.

“Can you believe it Hyukkie???!!!??? Baby Sibum—” Eunhyuk cut off Donghae.

“They chose the name Kiwon.” Eunhyuk said.

“What if it’s a boy?” Donghae asked.

“Look, when Kyumin have their baby, they can name baby girl or boy Kyumin or Sunghyun, or whatever.” He added to his explanation to be more specific, “Kiwon can be a boy or girl name, so can Sibum.”

“Yeah, hey guys…SHUT UP!” Heechul shouted.

Donghae smiled again and Eunhyuk closed his eyes and placed his hand on his forehead.

They heard the door open, a doctor walking towards them. Donghae’s smile widened and he jumped out of his seat.

“WHERE IS THE BABY??!!??” Donghae yelled in happiness. The doctor blinked a couple times while eyeing Donghae confusingly.

“You the Father?” The doctor asked, looking down at a clipboard in his hands.

Donghae pouted and looked down and whispered quietly, “N…no.”

“Where are the parents of the patient? Family members? Relatives?” The doctor asked.

“That I—_we_ don’t know. Kibum hasn’t kept in touch with his parents in while,” Sungmin answered.

“Well, where’s the Father of the child? Or who is?” The doctor asked and looked around at each young man’s face.

Siwon kept his eyes down; he stood, but then looked up at the doctor and said (getting stares at him), “Me_._”

“Is he fine?” Siwon asked.

“He was going somewhere. A car had been speeding. While the taxi driver was driving, the car hit the side of the taxi cab. Mr. Kim was close to being _completely_ unconscious. Luckily, he was able to give birth and stay awake for us to go through tests,” The doctor explained, everyone smiling and sighing in relief in return.

“Can we…see them?” Siwon asked.

The doctor frowned.

“What is it?” Siwon asked in worry.

“Mr. Kim is…resting.” Everyone seemed a little worried (widening their eyes.)

“What-what about the baby?” Ryeowook asked.

“You’re allowed to see him. He’s fine, but small. Only seven months old,” The doctor explained.

“Did you hear Hyukkie? DID YA!?!? It’s-it’s A BOY!” Donghae shouted in happiness, shaking his lover rapidly.

“Your reaction is as if this child is yours?” Eunhyuk questioned.

The doctor led the group into the room with all the babies in it. The doctor opened the door for them and then led them to an incubator. There was a baby sleeping and wrapped around in a blue cotton blanket. The doctor takes the infant in his arms and hands it to Siwon carefully.

Siwon took his son in his arms and smiled down at him. Tears of happiness fell from his eyes and cascaded from his cheeks as he stared at his son. His friends gathered from behind him to see the baby.

“He’s so, so cute!” Sungmin squealed.

“Not cute hyung! But…**ADORABLE**!” Ryeowook beamed in happiness while squealing in a happy tone.

“Can’t wait until Bummie sees his son,” Yesung whispered. Everyone looked at him, but Siwon.

Siwon noticed his son shift and stir as he slept.

Cute.

Just like Kibum.

Siwon remembered, Kibum had said when their child was grown up he or she would inherit Siwon’s looks and as a child, he or she would take Kibum’s.

_He was right_, Siwon thought as he let out a single chuckle.

“Hi…I’m your Appa. Your Umma is asleep right now…but he’ll be fine. Welcome to Earth…Choi Kim Kiwon.” 


	2. Leaving Me?

The day after Kiwon had been born finally came; Siwon had spent the night in the hospital. He kept his son in his arms the whole night as the baby slept. Siwon heard the door open, it was his friends.

“Hey, Wonnie how’s the cutie?” Heechul asked.

“Good, good. What brings you here?” Siwon asked.

“Freeze! We brought a fish that’s going to steal Kiwon!” Heechul said.

“Yeah, yeah.” Siwon said while chuckling.

“Siwon hyung, they’re coming.” Ryeowook said.

“Who are _they?” _Siwon asked making no eye contact with them.

“His parents,” Eunhyuk answered.

“They should be here in…less than 30 minutes.” Leeteuk said.

The door opened once again. Everyone looked at the new guest. It was the same doctor from yesterday.

“Dr. Jung, what is it?” Hangeng asked curiously.

“I came to see if Mr. Choi would wanted to see his wife?” Dr. Jung said.

“Donghae,” Siwon called out, while the younger male walked towards him. Siwon gave Donghae his son as he walked towards Dr. Jung.

The room was all white. It was quiet. The only thing that made noise was the beeping noise that came from a machine. The room was brightened by the window.

A young man sat on a chair beside the bed. There was also another young male, but who was lying on the bed in the room sleeping peacefully and snoring quietly. The man in the chair was holding the right hand of the man who was sleeping.

Siwon leaned his face close to Kibum’s. Siwon’s lips touched Kibum’s. Siwon stayed where he was. He didn’t want to move away. He wanted his lips _forever_ with Kibum’s.

Eyes fluttered and then finally snapped open. His eyes met with eyes that were fully closed. He realized lips were touching his? Someone was kissing him? Who could it possibly be?

The lips were soft…and he enjoyed it? The lips on his tasted…sweet and he could tell, the one kissing him was deepening the kiss. The closed eyes snapped open and met with the young man’s.

Siwon sat up and his sad mood turned to nothing but happiness.

“DOCTOR! DOCTOR HE’S UP!” Siwon yelled.

Dr. Jung arrived inside of the room with a male and female nurse behind him, “Jaejoong. Take Mr. Choi outside please,” Dr. Jung said as the mal nurse nodded his head and took Siwon by his arm, out of the room.

“Joongie,” Siwon called out to the male nurse, who was his friend.

Jaejoong, the beautiful nurse looked at him, “Yes, Siwon hyung?”

“What do you think…they’ll do?” Siwon asked with a bit of worry in his tone.

“I’m not sure myself. But…please stay out here until the doctor comes out with the news,” Jaejoong said before leaving his friend, not knowing that the latter had nodded to his words.

An hour later, Dr. Jung had come out of the room and walked towards Siwon. Siwon stood up from the chair he sat to wait, when he heard the footsteps belonging to the doctor.

“Can I see him?” Siwon asked, Dr. Jung nodded at his question.

Siwon went towards the door and grasped the doorknob and pushed the door open. He entered the room, where his lover awaited for him.

Kibum looked at Siwon. He seemed scared or freaked out. “Who-who…are you?” Kibum asked.

Siwon froze.

What did his lover just say to him? _Who are you?_

_Your prince, _Siwon thought with a piece of happiness from a memory made him smile inside of him, _and you’re my Snow White_.

Siwon walked towards the bed and then stopped. He had stopped because he had noticed the fear in his lover’s eyes. Was Kibum scared of his _own_ husband? Was he just…in shock, perhaps?

“Who…are you?” Kibum repeated his question.

The door opened, it was Dr. Jung who entered the room.

He smiled brightly, “Oh goodie! You guys are talking. Kibum, may I ask you a few questions?” Kibum nodded his head awkwardly, not understanding what was happening.

Dr. Jung turned to face Siwon and asked, “Mr. Choi, can you wait outside?”

Siwon wanted to yell, “Hell no! He’s my wife! The last time he was left alone, he was brought to the hospital. I’M HIS HUSBAND!” Sadly, Siwon didn’t want to make a scene in front of his _confused_ and _lost_ wife.

But he ended up replying to the doctor by nodding his head and exiting the room with confusion. Was Kibum in shock? Something _wasn’t_ right, and Siwon could tell clearly something was wrong. But what?

Dr. Jung sat down in the chair Siwon had sat on. He looked at Kibum deeply into his eyes. He asked questions and wrote stuff down on a piece of paper with a pen.

“Do you know your name?” Dr. Jung asked.

Kibum’s reply was, “Yes.”

“Say it, please.”

“Kim Kibum.”

“Do you know why you’re here?”

“No,” Kibum answered with a low, but clear tone.

“Do you know that man who was just in here?”

Kibum thought, _Why was he here? Shouldn’t Umma, Appa, and Minho hyung be here? Not that…unknown man? He…he was KISSING me???? Do we know each other? Also, his lips…weren’t like Minho hyung’s? Why isn’t my family here? _

“N…no,” He had finally answered Dr. Jung’s question.

Dr. Jung wrote the last details down and then stood up and walked away from the seat and looked back at Kibum, “You’ll be able to leave in two days.” Dr. Jung left the room after he was done speaking.

Kibum felt a bit sore. He wondered what had got him in the hospital. Was he hurt? Was the man who kissed him…_saved_ him?

Kibum sighed and leaned back and closed his eyes. He started taking deep breaths to relax himself. Inhaling and exhaling continuously.

An hour later, a couple arrived at the hospital. The man and woman seemed scared and worried. They were in the waiting room. They spotted a doctor and a young man talking. They knew who the young man was.

Choi Siwon.

The couple got out of their seats and walked towards the two men.

“Choi Siwon?” Mrs. Kim said.

The doctor and Siwon looked at the couple in front of them.

_They came_, Siwon thought.

“Mr. Kim…Mrs. Kim, you’re here?” Siwon said.

“Wait, you’re…Kim Kibum’s parents, right?” Dr. Jung asked the couple.

“Of course we are.” Mr. Kim said.

“What happened, Siwon? Did _you_ cause this???” Mrs. Kim questioned seriously.

“Since the parents are here and the husband—” Mr. Kim cute off Dr. Jung.

“HUSBAND?!? You two got married?” Mr. Kim said in shock.

Mrs. Kim snorted and spoke bitterly, “Look where he is now and he’s married to _you_.”

“May I explain what happened?” Dr. Jung asked, receiving nods from the three.

Dr. Jung led the three into a room with x-rays were posted on a wall. It was an x-ray of a brain. Dr. Jung pointed at where a specific part of the brain, “You see, Kibum was in a car accident. Somehow, his head was hit. Now, when I was asking him questions, for one, he didn’t know why he was in the hospital. He was luckily awake to deliver the baby.” Dr. Jung explained.

Mr. and Mrs. Kim looked at Siwon in shock. That was another thing they didn’t know. They had a grandchild that was on the way.

“Baby? He got married to the wrong man and had a baby with him?” Mrs. Kim said rudely.

“Wrong man?” Siwon questioned.

“It had to be you, Choi? Weren’t you with that…Kim Hyuna?” Mr. Kim asked.

“Never was.”

“Then why did Kibum break up with you, eh?” Mrs. Kim questioned.

“Okay, okay, let’s please not get into all of this. Right now, we’re talking about NOW, not a long time ago.” Dr. Jung said, breaking up the couple and Siwon. The three faced him.

“Good. Now, Kibum doesn’t know he had a baby. Now, what seems to be the problem with that is…the last thing Kibum was thinking of, is what he doesn’t remember. Now luckily and hopefully he’ll remember sooner or later. But that’s one thing that can happen. He can remember whenever; an hour later, days later, months later, or even _years_ later. But that’s something we won’t know,” Dr. Jung explained.

“Do you know what he remembers?” Mrs. Kim asked.

“He remembers his name, who are his parents, how old he is, and where he is.” Dr. Jung answered.

“We’ll know what he doesn’t when we ask, right?” Siwon asked.

“Yes, but I’ll remind you, if he doesn’t remember at first, don’t pressure it.” Dr. Jung informed them.

“Thank you, can we go see him?” Mrs. Kim asked. Dr. Jung nodded.

Mr. and Mrs. Kim and Siwon entered Kibum’s room. Kibum smiled when he spotted his parents. Siwon smiled too; seeing his love smile made him too. He knew the smile wasn’t for him, but for people Siwon and Kibum _hated_.

“Appa, Umma…you’re here?” Kibum asked.

“Of course we’d be here dear. How are you?” Mrs. Kim said.

“A little sore, but fine I guess. Where’s Minho-hyung?” Kibum responded to his Mother.

“He left to America not too long ago,” Mr. Kim answered for his wife.

“Who is he?” Kibum asked, eyeing Siwon.

Mr. and Mrs. Kim glanced at Siwon, but Mrs. Kim immediately turned back to her son with a smirk.

“He’s a friend of yours,” Mrs. Kim answered her son.

“Which one??? I have many,” Kibum said while letting out a chuckle.

“Choi Siwon.” Siwon said smiling widely, showing his dimples. Kibum smiled brightly.

“We heard that you get to leave in two days,” Mr. Kim said.

“Good, I’d like to see all of my friends soon.” Kibum said.

“We can bring them in, if you want?” Siwon asked.

Kibum turned to directly look at him with a _real_ and brighter smile while his parents hid their anger with fake smiles.

“I’d…like that, please.” Kibum said.

_What beautiful connection I feel between us right now, _Siwon thought.

“Of course,” Siwon said, leaving the room.

“We’ll be back darling.” Mrs. Kim said, while Kibum nodded. His parents left him.

Mr. Kim grabbed Siwon’s wrist and pulled him into the hallway harshly. Siwon was indeed startled that he was pulled away like that. But he wasn’t surprised when he saw Kibum’s parents in front of him.

“What do you want?” Siwon asked.

“We want to talk to you.” Mrs. Kim answered his question.

The three sat down in the waiting room to have a better chance of talking. Luckily, no one was eavesdropping or could possibly hear them, hopefully.

“Once again, what is it?” Siwon asked in frustration and annoyance.

“We want to make this clear to you, Choi. Our son doesn’t remember the _thing_ he gave birth to.” Mrs. Kim said.

Siwon looked into Mrs. Kim’s eyes in rage, “Never. Call. Our. Child. A THING. That child of course is the best that _ever_ happened to us. Hate your grandson, for all I care, hate me too. But don’t EVER insult him.” He gritted his teeth while speaking to show his anger.

“You can’t tell us what to do. Kibum won’t stop us. He doesn’t even know that _he_ exists.” Mrs. Kim said.

“You’re not going to tell your son that he is married and has a child???” Siwon questioned.

“We will,” Mrs. Kim said.

Siwon sighed in relief, but Mr. Kim finished his wife’s sentence, “When it’s time.”

“Will you really?” Siwon asked, with doubts in his head. They hated him and Kiwon, they couldn’t possibly want to tell Kibum. They couldn’t want that. That would be impossible. They insulted their grandchild.

“We aren’t that low,” Mr. Kim said. Siwon couldn’t do much but just nod.

“We’re taking him with us.” Mrs. Kim said.

“From everyone he loves? From his _real_ home?” Siwon asked.

“He’s coming home. If he wants to see his friends, he can. If he wants to even see _you_, we’ll let him.” Mr. Kim said.

Siwon stood up from his seat and walked away. He walked into the men’s room and leaned on the wall, crying.

His lover is now his friend?

Kiwon’s Mother is now a stranger?

The times with Kibum were now nothing?

Kissing Kibum, hugging Kibum, holding hands with Kibum, hanging out with Kibum, comforting Kibum, being happy with Kibum and making love to Kibum…was nothing?

Now, because of Kibum’s accident, he’s losing him.

Kiwon’s Umma.

Siwon’s wife.

_Gone_. 


	3. Not Right

Kibum’s parents had gone back to Kibum’s room and told them that they were leaving and _would_ come back in two days. Kibum felt a bit strange that his parents were leaving right after their son had just been in the hospital?

Meanwhile, Siwon had explained everything to his friends. Many were sad and worried about both Siwon and Kibum. They knew that they couldn’t tell Kibum about the marriage or even, about Kiwon. They had placed Kiwon back in the incubator while they left the room to see Kibum.

There were friends beside or at least around Kibum’s bed, except for Siwon. He was watching his wife smile and chat with their good and best friends.

There were a few times when Kibum would look at Siwon, but the older would look away just in time. Then when Kibum wasn’t looking or went back to chatting with their friends, Siwon would stare at him.

It seemed like an awkward situation for them. Their eyes didn’t meet during that time, sadly.

Siwon watched Kibum secretly by the corner of his eyes. And when he didn’t want to get caught, if Kibum looked his way, he’d look away or just look out of the window.

He spotted people driving away or people walking in and out of the building.

Siwon noticed his friends standing up and about to walk away. He hadn’t paid any attention to everyone’s conversation with Kibum (guilt welled up in him for that.)

He stood out, he could tell. Kibum eyed him and didn’t mention his name, but he knew that his own quietness was pretty noticeable. He was also noticeable because he was the only one standing or near the door.

Kangin walked towards Siwon and nudged his arm, “We’re going to stop by to see Kiwon one more time. Donghae can’t wait until you bring him home. Honestly, Eunhae are going to be spending nights at your house.”

Siwon chuckled.

Kangin added, “You’re **_not_** alone.” He must’ve noticed the awkwardness.

“Thanks,” Siwon replied.

“Plus, we want you to have a little alone time…with him.” Kangin said while smirking.

Siwon could tell what the latter was thinking. But it wasn’t like that, or at least not anymore. He couldn’t do things he used to do before with Kibum.

He couldn’t talk to his wife like how he used to.

He couldn’t kiss his wife.

He couldn’t hug his wife like he used to.

He couldn’t do any of things without permission or if by everyone’s surprise, Kibum immediately remembered Siwon.

“And do what? Talk?” Siwon said bitterly.

Kangin sighed deeply. He knew this wasn’t going to be easy for his friends. Damn, this wouldn’t be easy for anyone. It was as if Kibum was dead. He wasn’t there anymore. Siwon’s wife wasn’t there anymore. Kiwon’s Umma wasn’t there anymore. But strangely, was still there, **_alive_** luckily.

“Not kiss him, hug him, and tell him that _our_ son is born?” Siwon said.

That would be hard, but Kangin had to keep the man’s mind positive and not negative. “Hey, it’s better than _nothing_. People like Kibum could be dead, not as lucky as he was. People like _you_ are lucky.”

Siwon glanced at Kibum quickly; he was talking to Leeteuk and Ryeowook.

_Luckily he didn’t forget about all the important people in his life,_ Siwon thought with a small smile, _It’s just me…and **Kiwon**_.

“I know thanks.” Siwon said, realizing Kangin was right.

Kangin nodded and walked away. Siwon took a deep breath and walked towards Kibum.

“You were very quiet? You okay?” Kibum asked Siwon all of a sudden.

Siwon grinned and sat in the closest chair and looked at his wife. His heart ached, “I want you to talk to your friends. They were really worried about you. Even some that aren’t in Seoul. Like…Changmin, Junsu, Yoochun, and many others too. The others are making calls. They’ll most likely visit you when you’re out of the hospital or maybe by surprise, they’ll be here earlier.” He explained, folding his hands together and placing them on his lap.

“May I ask…why were you the first one in here?” Kibum asked, the question making the older flinch.

What was he supposed to say to that? How was he going to answer that? “I’m your husband and your parents weren’t here. Your friends were with our baby, and your parents took hours to arrive”? No. That would make him sound like a smartass.

He also didn’t want to sound rude and bitter in front of his wife. He loved his wife. It wasn’t Kibum’s fault either.

“I…” Siwon began with no thought. He couldn’t tell Kibum that he was his husband. But he couldn’t keep Kibum hanging with that question with no answer. He had to lie, “You were hurt and I found you…but we **_are_** friends.” Siwon said.

“The others weren’t here yet and neither were your parents. So, I asked to come see you.” Siwon explained, adding to his lie, which wasn’t all a lie.

Kibum’s parents were there.

Their friends were somewhere else.

Then again, their friends were here and his parents likely didn’t know about the car accident.

Kibum nodded his head, “Thank you… Wonnie?” Hearing that nickname made Siwon freeze. Memories came back to him.

_“Bummie?”_

_“Yes Wonnie?”_

_“Why do you like snow so much?”_

_“I just LOVE it! Chullie also says I’m Snow White too, remember?”_

_“You’re right…he does.”_

_“That makes you my Prince Charming!”_

_“Huh? Prince Charming?”_

_“Yeah, remember the story? The prince kissed Snow White when she was in deep sleep from the poison apple!”_

_“You think I’ll kiss you right after you’ve been asleep…and you were asleep because of such a tragedy?” _

_“Of course! You’re my Wonnie!”_

“Hello…Wonnie?” Kibum said, putting his hand in front of Siwon’s face to get his attention.

When Siwon heard his name, he snapped out of the memory immediately and faced the younger.

“Huh? Oh sorry!”

“Do you not like the nickname? I understand if it seems a bit…uncomfortable.” Kibum said, frowning.

“Huh? Oh no! That’s…what you’ve **_always_** called me, actually.” Siwon said, not lying. Even before that memory, which was long after they met, Kibum started calling him that.

“Really? How long have we known each other?” Kibum asked.

Siwon chuckled, “For a pretty long time.” Kibum nodded. Siwon changed the subject, “You should get some rest. You were hurt…pretty badly.”

As Kibum nodded once again, Siwon stood from the chair he was sitting in.

“Goodbye, Wonnie.”

Siwon smiled and nodded and waved as he exited the room, he didn’t leave yet. He leaned against the door he had just closed and whispered quietly, “_Goodbye…my love_.”

The next day, a young man had driven to the hospital with two other young men with him. Two of them went in the hospital, while one waiting in the car. When the two men came out, one was holding a baby and the other one was walking behind, smiling and making silly faces at the baby.

As Eunhyuk drove his car towards Sibum’s apartment, Sungmin was sitting in the passenger seat (up front with Eunhyuk), they had just picked him up from his job that was near the hospital. Someone had stolen Sungmin’s car, and Kyuhyun was at work and his phone was off. In the back, was Siwon, Donghae, and baby Kiwon.

Siwon was happy to be able to bring his son, but he _never_ expected to bring his child alone. He wasn’t literally alone, but…he would’ve expected every Father to bring his baby home with his wife.

Once they all had arrived at Sibum’s apartment, Donghae and Sungmin were played with Kiwon as Siwon and Eunhyuk watched.

“Sorry about the whole thing,” Eunhyuk said, referring to Siwon’s situation with Kibum.

“It’s fine, really. But Hyukkie…I’m really worried.”

“About?” Eunhyuk asked, looking directly at his friend.

“Kibum doesn’t know **_anything_** about the pregnancy or Kiwon. Nothing. I worry that…he never will.”

“Don’t think that. Maybe not now,” Eunhyuk glared at his cheerful and playful lover and smiled, “But maybe one day.”

Siwon looked at his son and smiled. One day, Kiwon would be with his Umma, Siwon promised.

Eunhae ended up sleeping over, including Yewook, Kangteuk, and Kyumin. Sadly, Siwon had work the next day. Ryeowook, Leeteuk, and Sungmin stayed with Kiwon as the others went to work.

The day after, Siwon had no work, but the couples stayed. Siwon had decided to go to the hospital to see Kibum. While he entered the hospital and Kibum’s room, he held a bouquet of white fresh roses (as white as snow.) Once he entered Kibum’s room, he noticed the boy was sleeping peacefully.

_It’s already 11:30 and his parents aren’t even here? _Siwon thought.

Siwon set the bouquet on top of the table in the room, with other flowers and gifts that were left by friends.

Somehow, his flowers he brought stood out. The others flowers seemed the same. There were no other flowers that were white. All were colorful and bright.

He smiled as he watched his lover.

Kibum’s his wife.

Kibum’s the mother his child.

Siwon walked towards Kibum, leaned close to his face, and placed a soft sweet kiss on his forehead. He exited the room and the building. While he was heading to his car, a young woman walked in front of him. His widened not only by the sudden surprise, but by who was there.

“Siwon-oppa!” The young woman called out, while Siwon plastered a sarcastic smile.

“Hyuna, what brings you here?” Siwon asked in hurried tone.

“I saw your car and I just came to see you,” Hyuna admitted.

“Well, you found me. You talked to me. That’s more than what you likely expected or said. I even _answered_ you! You should be thrilled!” Siwon exclaimed.

“Oppa! Why are you talking to me like this?”

“Why am I? Wait, why am I even talking to you in the first place?” Siwon said, grasping the handle to the car door.

Hyuna blocked Siwon’s way. He let go of the handle and crossed his arms, “What do you want?” He was pissed now, and irritated.

“I heard that poor Kibum got in a pretty bad accident?”

“Let me guess, you’re to go to his funeral right? Leave me alone Hyuna. Keep your STUPID fantasies to yourself. Dream all you want too. I’ll never be with _you_.” Siwon said, pushing Hyuna away and getting into his car.

“I heard he doesn’t remember you!” Hyuna blurted out. Siwon stopped. Was she stalking him now?

The surprise wasn’t just by how she knew, which was creepy. She could’ve possibly disguised herself as a nurse? She could’ve stolen some documents or records about the recent patients who’ve given birth to a baby and in a car accident?

That wasn’t the surprise to him at all.

What surprised him was how he himself hadn’t completely admitted that.

Kibum doesn’t remember him.

His wife doesn’t know who he is.

His soulmate knows nothing about him.

His lover has lost all memories of him.

He never admitted that by speaking it aloud, but even hearing someone say it—anyone, made him freeze and realize…his wife, his lover, his soulmate…doesn’t know who he is.

But that didn’t make him love Kibum any less. Yes, realizing and admitting such things would be painful, and he’d probably want to curse every time he saw people chatting as if they’ve known each other for a long time, and when he talks time he won’t know a thing.

He’s still married.

Kibum is still married.

He has a child.

Kibum has a child.

Siwon can’t love Kibum any less. He’s already promised himself and Kibum that his heart would only have room for one person, and it was all reserved for Kibum only.

Perhaps if he were to ever find someone else, he probably wouldn’t love that person as much as he loved Kibum, never. He might not ever choose someone besides Kibum.

Kibum is his only one.

Kibum is his _only love_.

“Doesn’t mean I’ll move on and be with you. I love and **_only_** love Kibum! No one can stop that feeling I have for him! You, his parents, my parents, our friends, or even himself…can’t stop me from loving him! My feelings will never change! I won’t ever betray Kibum! Leave me alone.” Siwon said determined and sure. He drove away from the parking lot and went home.

He would only love Kibum.

Kibum was his first love, and last.

There’s no one else.

Just Kibum.

Kibum was looking out of the window, as drops of water from the sky came landed on the hard glass. He was in the backseat of a black car. He wasn’t driving, but it was a driver who’s worked for Kibum’s parents for a long time, he was known as “Mr. Oh.” His parents were filthy rich, but they had money.

The car finally stopped. Mr. Oh quickly got out and opened the door for Kibum. Kibum was about to get his stuff, when Mr. Oh offered to carry them.

Kibum rejected the offer at first, but Mr. Oh said it was his job and that he felt bad for his injury, and so Kibum ended up letting Mr. Oh carry his stuff.

Kibum entered his so called home. He walked into the living room, finding his parents and a young man, both drinking red wine and chatting freely.

Kibum smiled when he spotted the young man. Once the young man’s and Kibum’s eyes met, the man stood up and walked towards Kibum.

“Kibummie,” The young man whispered and pulled the younger into a hug.

As Kibum hugged back with a smiled plastered on his face, the young man placed a kiss on his cheek.

The four ended up chatting and laughing together, well everyone bu Kibum. No one noticed either. They went on with their conversation, as if he weren’t there.

Somehow, this didn’t feel right. Nothing did. It’s as if…he remembers spending time with the young man and his parents, but somehow, he felt a huge gap. As if, this wasn’t _always_ like this.

As if years ago, a gap was made and then everything else went on. Like if…someone was in his life, but was an unclear blur. Nothing can be seen.

Minutes later, the four were eating dinner at a long rectangular table in the dining room. When he saw down and felt the fabric of the cushion, or even just the patterns, it didn’t seem right. He hasn’t felt such fabric or seen such patterns in a very long, long, long time.

He drank out of a clear long wine glass. As he did, he felt the feeling once again. He hasn’t used or felt such or seen such glass in a long time.

Seeing his parents laugh and chat didn’t seem right either. Taking a bite out of the posh food wasn’t right. Something, all of these things, he wasn’t used to.

He felt the young man beside take his hand, “Minho,” He whispered as he faced him.

“Now we can catch up on what he started,” Minho said, smiling at Kibum.

Minho's hand, wasn't right. They weren't familiar or warm (like the warmth he once knew.) Minho leaned close to Kibum's face and then, their lips met.

Kibum can see from the corner of his eyes, his parents were in awe and happiness.

As for Kibum, he didn't like this at all.

_No, this isn't right. These lips, this kiss, these hands, this person...it's not right_, Kibum thought.

Why didn't he feel anything with his _boyfriend_? Why didn't he love him? Kibum knew, he didn't like this kiss. He didn't like feeling these hands or being with this man either.

But he knows...someone else's love...was right and this love **_wasn't_**.


	4. Shocking Moment

Two weeks had passed since Kibum’s whole accident. Siwon wasn’t being a stalker, but he watched his wife from afar. He noticed Kibum was hanging with his parents more, some friends (he didn’t know of) from the school he moved to, and a young man Siwon didn’t know, know, but knew of him. **_Lee Minho_**.

Siwon had driven back to the apartment. Luckily, this whole week he had no work. Kiwon’s grandparents had come to see him, and so did his aunt, Jiwon.

Siwon parked his car and entered the building. Once he made it to the right floor, he went to his door and unlocked it and entered his apartment. He was greeted by Ryeowook, and Donghae.

“How was your day?” Ryeowook asked innocently.

“Good, hey, I thought Teukie was here?” Siwon said with confusion. He remembered that the older had called and told him he’d be there.

“He’s taking a shower…you don’t mind, right?” Ryeowook asked shyly.

Siwon answered awkwardly, “Um…of course not, all my friends welcomed to shower here, but…may I ask why?”

“You see…Kangin and him were doing **_it_. **They did it all morning, and when they stopped, Leeteuk went to shower. Right when he was about to go in the water, it shut off. The water is somehow off for everyone in those apartment buildings for a couple of hours.” Ryeowook explained as Kiwon started playing with his fingers.

“Did he get a note?”

“No. He got a call. Kangin was gone since he was called for work. He said he’ll go down and pay after work.” Donghae finished Ryeowook’s explanation, but not looking at any of them.

“Hae, where’s Hyukkie?” Siwon asked. The Eunhae couple was always a pair; it was weird to see them apart.

“Oh, he’s at work. But afterwards, he’s going to pack his stuff.” Donghae answered shortly.

_Eunhae are going to be spending nights at your house._

Kangin’s words came back to him.

Was…Eunhae moving into the apartment?

“Why…where is he going?” Ryeowook was the first one to ask.

“His parents are inviting us to go with them to Paris!” Donghae exclaimed happily, taking Kiwon’s little hands and shaking them.

“Why are you guys going to Paris? Family trip? Little get away? Business? Or for fun?” Ryeowook asked curiously.

“Um…actually, Eunhyuk’s sister, Lee Sora, is getting married!” Donghae said.

Ryeowook clapped his hands, while Siwon nodded his head. Footsteps came closer and closer. Everyone looked at the newcomer.

“Teukie!” Ryeowook called out.

Leeteuk had blue jeans, a plain grey shirt, and a small white towel around his neck. He spoke softly, “Hello Wonnie. Sorry about using your shower.”

“There’s no problem at all,” Siwon said.

“Where were you, by the way?” Leeteuk asked sitting on the couch.

“Watching my wife.”

Ryeowook and Donghae exchanged glances and then went back to playing with Kiwon.

“Why watch when you can go see or visit your wife? You two are legally married.” Leeteuk said.

“He doesn’t know that.” Siwon said.

“Let me guess, it’s for the best??” Leeteuk said sarcastically.

“I don’t think it’s the right time.” Siwon said.

“Don’t you have a bit of hope? Don’t you want things to go back to the way they were? How everything should’ve ended up?” Leeteuk asked.

“Of course I want it to be like the way it was. Of course I have a bit of hope. But, I don’t want to be known as the Husband Who Messed Up His Wife’s Life.” Siwon said.

“You’re right. We shouldn’t put **_any_** pressure on Kibum.” Leeteuk agreed.

Siwon walked towards Donghae, Ryeowook, and Kiwon. Kiwon looked up and giggled while smiling. He lifted up his little arms out so he could be picked up.

Siwon bent down and picked up Kiwon. “Of course I have hope that your Umma will come back to us.” He smiled brightly. “I promise Kiwon, your Umma will come back. For you—for us.” He whispered and pecked his son’s cheek.

Kibum was walking on the sidewalks of Seoul. He was talking on the phone with someone.

“Kibum ah, where are you?” The man on the other line asked.

“Minho, why are you calling this early?” Kibum asked.

“Early? Kibummie, it is 2:30 pm! What do you mean _early?” _Minho asked chuckling.

“You know what I mean Min! We met up 15 minutes ago and you’re calling me now?”

“I want to make sure that no one kidnapped or harassed you! Anyone would kidnap someone as perfect as you!” Minho said.

“Um…thanks for the comment, but I’m fine, really.” Kibum said, replacing his bored face with a look of annoyance. His eyes wandered and landed on an apartment building.

“Hey Kibummie, where are you?”

“Um…why?” Kibum asked softly.

“I was thinking…if you want to you know, spend the night at my place?” Minho asked.

“Oh really? And do what? Let me guess, you’ll have wine bottles and wine glasses in the room?” Kibum asked, hoping that Minho wasn’t planning to do **_it_**.

Even today, Minho had been with Kibum for hours. Telling him stuff that Kibum didn’t want to hear and going to FANCY places.

Kibum wasn’t used to all of the fancy places! Though one question kept repeating. _Why was he used to it?_ Shouldn’t he be used to it? His parents were pretty fancy and had money, and so did Minho. Kibum remembers going to fancy places, but why is it that practically _everyone_ is taking him to fancy places.

Kibum could remember how Minho was thinking of **actually** taking Kibum to Italy when they were eating freaking Italian food! Kibum knew his temper was heating up and he couldn’t put up with it anymore.

“Well, you are coming?” Minho asked in a low voice. Kibum didn’t answer. He was thinking of going or not. The only reason he’d go, would be because he’s scared that Minho will break up with him. Kibum was confused. He remembers being with Minho, but then again, being with him didn’t feel right.

Kibum wanted to make sure he had no feelings for Minho, before cutting the line.

“Sorry Minho, I can’t.” Kibum said.

“Huh? Wae?” Minho asked in a whiny and confused voice.

“My friend is in shock and he needs me,” Kibum lied.

He wasn’t going to Minho’s home.

He wasn’t going to be fancy like Minho.

And he definitely wasn’t going to sleep in Minho’s fancy bed and have **_it_** with him. In a fancy way or not.

“But Bummie,” Minho whined. Kibum froze in place.

No one called him “Bummie” except for his friends and Siwon. It seems better when they called him Bummie, not Minho or his parents. But Kibum somehow liked how Siwon said it.

He said it with his nice and gentle voice and seemed to always smile every time he said it.

“Um…my phone is dying…_kerrrr—kerrrrrr_…oh the battery…_kurrrrrr—kur, kur—kerrrrrrrrr_…is dead!” Kibum said, hanging up afterwards. 

He noticed his two friends, Eunhyuk and Yesung, walking into the apartment building right after a woman who wore short clothing walked in.

He didn’t remember Eunhyuk or Yesung living around these buildings. He decided to follow his friends and see what was awaiting them.

Donghae was left alone in the kitchen, while Ryeowook was changing Kiwon with Leeteuk, and Siwon was in the shower. The fire alarm went on, scaring everybody except Donghae. Ryeowook opened the window so the smoke and the smell of burnt food were exiting the apartment. Donghae opened the door to let the smell out too.

Leeteuk calmed Kiwon down (the noise of the alarm made him fussy) while Siwon was washing away the conditioner that was still in his hair.

A woman came in front of the doorway. She wore a sleeveless red shirt, a black mini skirt, and boots that went to her knees. She looked around and found no one.

She heard footsteps from behind. Eunhyuk and Yesung were shocked when they saw the woman.

“Hyun-Hyuna? What the hell are you doing here?” Yesung asked in annoyance. She turned to them with a smirk on her face.

“To make Siwon oppa mine,” Hyuna said.

“Who the hell do you think you are? I think he’s told you, you can’t. He DOESN’T love you clearly.” Eunhyuk said looking at her with a face full of anger.

Footsteps were heard from behind and in front of them. Siwon was in front of them, holding baby Kiwon in his arms. Hyuna realized, from behind them, Kibum was coming.

She walked towards Siwon, smiling down at Kiwon. Kibum walked into the apartment, eyeing Siwon…the woman, and a baby.

“Awe, our baby has said his first word? Umma? You said Umma?” Hyuna cooed.

Siwon noticed Kibum.

They both stared at each other.

Their eyes locked tight.

Forgetting about reality. 


	5. Replaced?

The smell of burnt food was exiting the apartment from the window. It wasn’t the burnt food that was in the room. Shock. Two people_._ Two people looking at each other’s eyes, making no eye contact with anyone, but themselves.

It seemed as if one of them, didn’t just have shock but maybe even…sadness and jealousy. The other person had shock, happiness, and…anger. Everyone else, who were around them, just watched.

No words.

No movements.

“Oppa, isn’t our baby just precious?” Hyuna cooed as she looked up at the male with a smile. He didn’t answer.

Ryeowook and Leeteuk were behind Siwon, while Yesung and Eunhyuk stood in front of Kibum, but even though the younger male was in the back, he could see clearly.

Yesung’s jaw dropped by the scene, Eunhyuk stared at them, so did Leeteuk and Ryeowook.

“Oh hell no!” Yesung whispered, placing a hand over his mouth.

Yes, it was definitely shock. Not just because of Hyuna’s actions, but…Kibum was there to see. Kibum hadn’t visited Siwon. He didn’t know where Siwon lived.

Donghae walked towards everyone, a phone in his right hand and a bright smile on his face. “It’s okay guys, I called in. The food should be ready in 20 to 30 minutes. Who’s picking it up?” He said, still smiling.

He eyed everyone, he was confused. When he saw Hyuna, he realized what was wrong.

“Um…Hyuna, you should be, oh—um! Get going!” Ryeowook had broken the silence by his words.

Hyuna shot the young male a deadly glare, making him shriek.

“Yeah, I agree. Now. Leave...be gone…go! Never come back,” Eunhyuk agreed pointing at the door.

“So I have to go? Leaving my son?” Hyuna asked and pouted everyone but Kibum and Siwon stared at her.

“Shit, she really wants us to call Chullie, doesn’t she? He’ll kick her a** out!” Yesung whispered, looking away.

“He’s not your child.” Leeteuk said, crossing his arms.

“How would you know? You weren’t there when he was born.” Hyuna said.

“Neither were you.” Ryeowook said.

Three to four seconds later, Hankyung, Heechul, and Kyuhyun arrived.

“Hey, we’re here,” Hankyung called out.

“Do you guys wanna go to the…bar?” Hankyung stopped when he realized what they got themselves into.

“Oh shit,” Kyuhyun cursed, seeing and noticing the whole situation too.

“I know, right?” Yesung whispered to Kyuhyun.

“Why are _you_ here?” Heechul asked, looking at Hyuna.

“None of your business,” Hyuna shot back in annoyance.

“Bitch, please. I’m not in the mood. NO one wants you here, so scatter.” Heechul hissed.

“This isn’t you’re apartment. It’s Oppa’s!” Hyuna hissed.

“Ugh, you’re getting on my nerves. You know what? Horsey is in shock meaning he can’t throw you out. You got two choices. Leave or I’m dragging you out.” Heechul said with a hint of irritation in his voice.

Hyuna looked annoyed, but she didn’t move from her spot.

“You want something; you got to do it yourself.” Heechul whispered at the ones behind him.

He walked towards Hyuna and grabbed her wrist, dragging Hyuna out of the whole building (leaving the apartment and building.) Hyuna tried struggling and hitting Heechul, but there was something she didn’t know about this diva: Kim Heechul _always_ gets his way.

He left her outside and walked back into the building. Heechul closed and locked the door to Siwon’s apartment. He eyed Kibum and Siwon.

He grabbed Kibum’s left wrist; Kibum responded by looking at his friend with confusion. Heechul eyed Donghae, receiving the fish’s attention, and then eyed Kiwon 3 times. Donghae nodded and took the baby out of Siwon’s arms.

Heechul then took Siwon’s left wrist too. He went out of the entry area, went down the hall, and entered the bedroom shared by the Sibum. He let go of the two once they were completely in the room, and closed the door on them.

Siwon immediately ran towards the door and tried to open it, but someone was holding the handle.

“YAH! Let us out! Come on!” Siwon shouted banging on the door while Kibum sat on the bed, watching Siwon, who was trying to knock down the door while yelling out to those from the other side.

Kibum sighed and laid his chin on his palm.

“YAH! OPEN THE DOOR!” Siwon yelled.

“I’ll open it. After you _talk_…with Bummie.” Heechul whispered.

Siwon sighed and glanced at Kibum. His chin was lying on his palm, he seemed tired and exhausted?

It made Siwon curious.

_Maybe he didn’t get enough sleep? From what? His parents? Friends? _Siwon thought.

He walked towards the bed and sat beside Kibum and watched him. He smiled. It seemed as if Kibum was sleeping. He had his eyes shut and he snored quietly and peacefully.

Siwon made no eye contact with anything else in the room, but Kibum. As he stared at Kibum, he couldn’t help but search through a selection of memories in his head to think of. He had picked one that reminded him of right now.

_Siwon and Kibum were both on a bed, a cover not covering their upper body. Both smiling at each other. Siwon had explained to Kibum long ago about the whole misunderstanding. And here they are now. _

_At Siwon’s parents house, in Siwon’s room. On Siwon’s bed. Both happy together. _

_Siwon placed his hand on Kibum’s cheek and looked into his eyes. Happiness. Siwon looked seeing those dark eyes. He couldn’t stand a day without staring into those eyes._

_“You okay…Wonnie?” Kibum asked softly._

_“Yes,” Siwon answered, looking at Kibum only._

_“I’m happy that I know now. But I’m also sorry that…I didn’t even stay to listen to the explanation.”_

_“It’s fine really. I would’ve done the exact same. But I promise, I’ll try to stay and listen,” Siwon said and then pausing. He leaned closer and closer to Kibum. “Because hurting you, kills me.” He whispered, placing a soft kiss on Kibum’s lips._

Siwon felt someone tap his shoulder. He snapped out of his thoughts and shook his head, going back to reality and the present. He looked up, where the tap came from.

Again. Dark eyes. Siwon smiled as he looked at Kibum.

“Ye-yes?”

“You…okay?” Kibum asked, a little worried about the older.

“Hmmm, yeah of course! Why?” Siwon said nervously. His expression probably showed that he was in daze, or thinking hardly about something.

“You stared at me…for a quite long time and I’ve called your name, you didn’t respond though.” Kibum said.

“Oh sorry. I was…just in my thoughts.” Siwon said.

“Now what?”

“Well…Chullie said we should _talk_ things out or something.” Siwon said.

Kibum turned to face the older and asked, “About what? What is there to talk about?”

The scene.

Hyuna.

Kiwon.

How could Siwon have these events fall upon on him…and _he_ had to find a way to cover it all up or…to lie?

“Um…about what happened earlier, you know?” Siwon asked. He hoped there was nothing wrong. He hoped there weren’t much questions either. He’d like to avoid tears and negative thoughts. He was still trying to get rid of the fact that his wife or the mother to his child didn’t even know about his child or about his lover.

“Why would we need to talk about…that?” Kibum asked.

“Well…I guess you seemed…_different_?” Siwon asked, trying to specific. What had Kibum felt while he saw everything? Anger? Confusion? Jealous, perhaps?

But why would he be angry? Did he remember Siwon and Kiwon already? He was probably confused…but jealous?

“I’m not jealous, if that’s what you thought…but I was, in shock.” Kibum finally said.

Siwon nodded and spoke softly, “Well, why were you shocked?” He asked curiously.

Kibum sighed deeply and tilted his head. He then went back and turned directly to face Siwon. “I don’t remember my friend that I’ve known for a _long_ time…had a child.”

Siwon stared at Kibum and a smile crept to his face.

_Because it’s just complicated, _Siwon thought.

“I mean, the others seem to know. Did you not tell me?” Kibum asked.

_You were the one who gave birth to him, _Siwon thought.

“Were you…_mad_ at me or something?”

“Oh no, not at all. I guess…I forgot? I mean…there were so many things…going on.” Siwon explained while the younger nodded afterwards.

“Well congrats, both you and Hyuna?” Kibum said with awkwardness. He could’ve sworn that was the girl’s name. He heard his friends call her that.

“Huh? No. She’s not the Mother. I’d _never_ sleep with her. Never.” Siwon said with a bright smile.

“So, who is…if I may ask?” Siwon stared up at the ceiling. How was he supposed to answer this?

“I understand…if you don’t want to say.” Kibum said, noticing Siwon’s silence.

“No, no, no. It’s fine, really. My…boyfriend gave birth to him.” Siwon explained as the younger nodded.

“Where…where is?” Kibum asked. He hadn’t seen anyone else in the apartment when he entered.

Siwon’s eyes had sadness and grief in them as he continued on explaining, “He left…after giving birth to our son.”

Kibum seemed shock. He asked, “Why would he do such thing? Just…abandon his lover and child like that?”

Siwon chuckled, but that didn’t make this moment any less sadder than it already was. “It’s fine. Don’t blame him. _I_ wasn’t even there when our son was born. I wasn’t there…when he _needed_ me the most.” Siwon said, tears escaping his eyes.

Kibum pulled the older into a hug, and said, “It’ll be okay. I believe that one day…he’ll come back to you.”

“I believe so…too.” Siwon said, while crying. It wasn’t long before the older male found himself foolish and quickly wiped away the tears.

“You okay?” Kibum asked realizing the tears were gone. Siwon nodded to his question. He thought of something. Perhaps this would make the older a bit happier? “So…what’s his name?” He asked, smiling at Siwon.

Siwon smiled back and answered, “Choi Kiwon.”

Kibum’s smile disappeared when he heard that name. Somehow, at that _exact_ moment, he felt his head ache painfully. It felt as if his head was being split apart.

To his and the elder’s surprise, he fell off where he sat and placed a hand on his head and wined in pain.

“Kibum…Kibum…Kibum! Kibum! Kibum!” He heard his name being called, but he didn’t answer.

To his surprise, he cleared everything from his head. He _remembered_ something.

_“Kiwon will be our child’s name.”_

_“Huh? Why choose ‘Won’? Yours is better!”_

_“Kiwon sounds amazing. Anyways, you decided our family name is Choi. Our baby’s name is…Choi Kiwon.”_

_Choi…Kiwon…Kiwon…Kiwon…_

_Our baby’s name is...Choi…Kiwon…_

The words kept repeating in his head and so did the memory. It hurt his head. All of this going on…made his head ache painfully.

He continued wincing in pain, which made Siwon shocked and frightened.

Unexpectedly, the door to the bedroom had been pushed open widely and people ran inside.

“YAH! We told you clearly to _talk_ to him! Not rape him!” Heechul shouted at the male confused and shock that was sitting on the bed.

“I didn’t rape him nor was I trying to. I was…talking to him. He fell to the ground and winced in pain.” Siwon explained truthfully.

“Kibum ah, are you okay?” Ryeowook asked softly.

Kibum calmed himself down and panted lightly. “Ye…yes,” Kibum replied.

“Good. See, nothing to worry about.” Hankyung said.

Ryeowook and Sungmin walked towards Kibum and helped him stand up. When they took a few steps, Kibum fell forward.

“Kibum! Kibum! Kibum! Kibum!” They all continued to call his name, even though they knew he was unconscious already.

A group of boys waited in the waiting room until the doctor came. By their surprise, once again, it was Dr. Jung.

“Here again, I see?” Dr. Jung said smirking widely.

“Is he or is he not okay?” Heechul launched a question without any patience.

“He’s fine. Whatever he remembered brought him _stress_. That’s why he fainted. I told you guys to not pressure it.”

“How was I supposed to know that telling him our child’s would stress him out???” Siwon asked.

“You’ve discussed about baby names, right? He must’ve remembered the talk and when you chose a name obviously. Please, think before acting! Stress is **_not_** good for him.” Dr. Jung reminded them all once again.

“Can we see him?” Eunhyuk asked.

Dr. Jung nodded his head.

The group were about to enter the room but stopped when they noticed one person wasn’t following and was _still_ sitting down.

“YAH! Horsey, get your a** over here!” Heechul called out with annoyance.

“I’m the cause of this. The cause…of him hurting and stressing out.” Siwon said.

Kangin rolled his eyes and shrugged, “It’s not your fault. It was just…a slip up. Nothing to worry about. Stress…isn’t something easy or good to deal with but, things happen.”

“True. You didn’t plan to make him stressed out or…in pain of any sort. We all—_he_ knows too, that you wouldn’t try or dare to hurt him, ever.” Leeteuk added on to what his lover said.

True.

Siwon hadn’t planned this.

Kibum had asked a question and all Siwon did, was answer.

It wasn’t his fault.

He just…made a small mistake. And that was fine.

“Now get over here before I drag you over here!” Heechul said.

Siwon looked at the older and sat up to walk towards them. They all entered the room.

“Kibummie, are you okay?” Leeteuk asked in his _motherly_ tone and mood as always.

“Yes Teukie, I’m fine. It’s nothing, really.”

“If we may ask, what did you remember?” Henry asked with not much of hesitation.

“Henry.” Heechul and Siwon warned with a look saying I’m-going-to-kill-you.

“What? It was just a question?” Henry said, shrugging innocently. The younger didn’t mean it. It was an innocent mistake and everyone knew that.

Kibum must’ve read the glares belonging to the diva and handsome man. “It’s okay. I remember…hearing voices, but not much of faces, just blurs. But, it was all so quick…I can’t really remember what they were specifically saying.”

“Did the voices sound familiar to you?” Sungmin asked.

It seemed that Siwon’s eyes had hope.

_No…I can’t tell them. I might sound crazy! Hearing…him and…me? Our…BABY’S name? What does this mean? _Kibum thought nervously as he looked at his friends.

“No. None of the voices sounded familiar.” Kibum answered.

“_Oh_,” They all chorused and nodded their head.

“Well, you’re fine and that’s what matters!” Ryeowook said joyfully.

“We’ll be back tomorrow. But…your parents will come and get you.” Leeteuk announced as the younger nodded.

They all ended up leaving, but it was rather a strange order. Siwon was the first one to leave out of everyone. He had felt guilty.

The next day, Donghae and Eunhyuk bid their goodbyes by text messages as they left to the airport early in the morning.

Siwon picked up Kiwon from his parents’ house.

During that time, Mr. and Mrs. Kim had left to go pick up their son from the hospital. Kibum felt a bit upset that he’d have to go back to his parents, his other friends, and then…_Minho_.

Kibum wanted to get out of all of the time he was spending with his family, other friends, and Minho…but they kept taking him somewhere and kept their eyes on him and their hands too. Making sure he didn’t get out of _their_ sight or distance.

Siwon was in his apartment with Kiwon, Kangin, Leeteuk, and Ryeowook. Siwon was sorting out bills at the dining table for three, with Kangin, while the other two were playing with Kiwon.

“You know, the bills are going up. It used to go down when there _two_ people paying these bills.” Kangin said, looking at two small sheets of paper. Stares by everyone but Kiwon was what Kangin got.

Siwon sighed deeply and took a piece of paper with printed writing. He groaned while reading it completely.

“What?” Kangin asked, noticing the whole scene in front of him.

“This bill is due today, must’ve forgotten. The closest bank is at that mall…at the left corner, right?” Siwon said.

Kangin nodded, “Yup. If you ask me, they have a lot of you know, _fancy_ and _expensive_ stuff.” The man wasn’t even looking at him while talking.

Siwon left the apartment with his wallet and car keys, after bidding his goodbyes to his friend and son.

Kibum was walking with Minho in a huge mall. Their hands were intertwined together. Once again, the feeling started coming in Kibum, it didn’t feel right. He knows…he felt hands that were _perfectly_ warm and ones that…fit his perfectly.

They ended up stopping in front of a store that sold fancy and expensive perfume and cologne.

Minho turned to face Kibum with a wide smile, “Kibum ah, do you want to go in?” Kibum could tell by the latter’s smile, that he had interests in the store. But he himself knew for sure that he didn’t.

“No. I’m fine, thanks. You go in though,” Kibum said softly with a sweet and gentle smile.

Minho nodded and entered the shop while Kibum decided to stand in front of the store and wait for the latter to return.

Siwon had walked into the mall to find the bank. He knew for sure, it was on the second floor, so he took the escalators to go down.

Siwon spotted a figure in front of a perfume and cologne store, but had continued walking until he got to the bank. Afterwards, he walked a little towards the perfume and cologne store, but not too close. The figure…

It was _Kibum_.

His wife.

His lover.

He smiled and walked towards Kibum from behind him.

The younger was just standing in front of the store as if he were waiting for someone.

By his surprise, a man walked out of the store with nothing. Kibum turned to the man and made his way towards him. The man pulled him into a hug. Kibum let go, but that gave the man an opportunity to place a kiss on his lips.

Siwon stared at the two in shock…and anger.

The man leaned a bit closer to likely deepen the kiss and then let go of Kibum completely. The two intertwined their hands together and walked away. Away from the store. And away…from Siwon.

That was Minho.

Minho was the one Kibum was with now?

Siwon and now…him?

Kibum had no memory of his and Siwon’s love. Now…all of the love was nothing but dust. Something forgotten and uncared for. The love they had…faded away. It’s as if it had left as quickly as if had been welled up inside of them both during that time.

Siwon was forgotten.

He was being erased from Kibum’s memory.

He was being forgotten by Kibum.

Siwon was being _replaced_ by the man known as **Lee Minho**. 


	6. Why Do I See You and Not Him?

Siwon watched as the couple walked farther and farther away from him. He hadn’t moved one bit ever since he saw his wife waiting for someone. It seemed as if he was waiting for him; but that’s what Siwon thought.

It’s what he wanted and hoped for. _His_ wife waiting for _him_, not Minho. As Siwon watched his wife days ago, he had seen the man and Kibum together, but he never thought and believed they were _that_ close.

He had thought wrong. Now look at where he is. Standing still, sad and hurt and in deep shock. It seemed as if this is what he gets for having such high hopes: _you only get hurt_.

Siwon didn’t feel like moving or leaving. Though he knew a worker in the mall would say, “Sir, what are you doing?” or a mall cop might say, “Sir please move or leave. The people are getting worried and freaked out.”

He’d boil up in annoyance. He would ignore them. He would continue to stand still. Until _Kibum_ came back for him, was when he’d leave. Just for Siwon.

How much Siwon wished this was all a dream. Then again, this wasn’t a dream, asleep or awake. It was a _nightmare_. A dream was something people would rather enjoy, and there was no enjoyment in Siwon. Dreams were things you wouldn’t want to wake up from, while nightmares were things you’d _desperately_ want to wake up from.

Yup, for Siwon, he wanted to wake up and lie beside Kibum, like it **_always_** was. Waking up beside Kibum was a dream to Siwon that he never wished to wake up from. Even if the younger was just asleep, Siwon would treasure the moment. He’d never forget it. He’d watch the younger sleep as if it were his last time watching Kibum sleep.

Siwon felt a tap on his right shoulder. He ended up snapping out of his thoughts, but still didn’t move. He heard a deep sigh and then someone pulled him away from his spot. He ended up facing _the_ cat diva.

“Heechul? Why are you here?” Siwon asked confusingly. 

“What does it look like to you, Mr. Smarty Pants?” Heechul asked, gesturing the shopping bags. Understand and realizing the diva was there to shop, of course, Siwon nodded.

“Sorry,” Heechul said.

“Huh? For what?” Siwon asked curiously. He could’ve sworn his friend had done nothing wrong…at least he didn’t think so.

“About the _whole_ scene back there. It must’ve pierced your heart, right?” Heechul asked with his hands on his hips. Siwon nodded his head to his friend’s reply.

“Wanna talk about it?” Heechul asked.

“Does it look like I do?” Siwon asked with a spark of anger lighting up in him.

“Geez. You got to be all tough don’t you? No. Of course you wouldn’t want to talk about it, that’s quite obvious to everyone who knows about your situation. Anyone can tell, you look like shit! Who would want to talk about it when it just happened, eh? I knew you’d react like this.”

“Then why ask?” Siwon asked in annoyance.

“I’m afraid that you’d commit suicide,” Heechul said seriously.

Siwon immediately looked offended, “I’m not stupid.”

“No. You aren’t, but just because you aren’t stupid doesn’t mean you won’t _try_ stupid things.” Heechul said.

“Stupid things…like what?” Siwon challenged. What could he possibly do? Yes, this was all hard…but how far could he actually go? Or how anyone can?

Heechul looked down at his shoes and then back up with more confidence and seriousness in his expression and tone, “Abandon Kiwon.”

What? Abandon Kiwon? Abandon his own son that he _can_ take care of? Siwon wouldn’t have the heart do so. But…anyone could possibly do that.

Kiwon is just a baby. Siwon’s and Kibum’s child. Kiwon is a part of the couple. How could Siwon abandon something not only a part of him, but of Kibum? Yes, it seemed hard to not raise a baby without a Mother, but…Kiwon was Siwon’s son. He could never, no matter what…abandon him.

Kibum doesn’t even remember or know he has a baby. Siwon wished for Kibum to spend time with Kiwon, so he’d recognize who his Mother really is. If Kiwon was surrounded by Donghae, Ryeowook or Leeteuk **_too_** much, Kiwon could mistakenly think one of them as his Mother.

Siwon wanted Kibum to spend time with Kiwon, but how? He can’t just go to Kibum and say, “We have a baby together.” No. That would make Kibum confused and lost. That’s the _last_ thing Siwon wants for Kibum.

He knew for sure, it wouldn’t be easy to get Kibum back. There was just too much that Kibum didn’t remember.

“What? Why would I do that?” Siwon asked with a bit of anger in his tone.

Heechul sighed deeply and answered, “People tend to do stupid stuff in moments like this. It’s nothing no one really had intentions on doing so, but it happens. But I’m not saying that you _would_. Because I know and believe and hope you don’t. Even if you think and say you would, in the end, you wouldn’t. But, you don’t _fool_ me.” He smirked afterwards.

“No one does,” Siwon admitted.

No fooled _the _Kim Heechul.

“Come on. Let’s get you home,” Heechul said as the younger agreed by nodding.

The two left the mall and both drove in their own cars to Sibum’s apartment. The memory of Kibum being with another man, made Siwon’s tears fall onto the material of his jeans.

Minho had dropped Kibum off at his house. Before Minho left, he had placed a soft kiss on Kibum’s cheek.

Kibum sighed in relief as Minho left. It was another day with Mr. Fancy.

Kibum heard his Mother’s voice, and another woman’s too coming from the living room. He didn’t clearly recognize the woman’s voice at first, which made him almost walk in, but it was his Mother’s words that made him freeze, or what made time stop.

“Yes, I do agree. They _should_ get married.” Mrs. Kim squealed.

“Marriage? It sounds absolutely perfect! Minho and Kibum are such a perfect couple! My son would totally agree as well! But are they ready? I mean, it’s only been two or less weeks since the accident.”

_Minho’s Mother? Mrs. Lee? Marriage? _Kibum thought in confusion.

“Come on! Haven’t you seen them? They need to get married,” Mrs. Kim said in a “must happen” tone.

Kibum stepped a bit back.

His Mother and Mrs. Lee, want him and Mingo to get married? How could this happen? Wasn’t this a bit “all of a sudden”? Kibum doesn’t even feel right being with Minho. Damn, he doesn’t feel right being with his **_parents_**.

Dealing with the previous memory he had, how could he get married? He just came back from the hospital too, and here he is, listening to his Mother and Minho’s mother planning his and Minho’s wedding ceremony.

He dashed upstairs to his room. He slammed and locked the door, knowing someone obviously heard. He then threw himself onto his bed carelessly and tiredly. He heard a little noise from his desk (his laptop.)

He climbed off his bed and went towards the laptop to enter his email to check his inbox just to find one new message. The title on the message was, “_International Mail.”_

Kibum tilted his head in confusion and debated if he should open or not. Random or messages that were from somewhere else, sometimes weren’t good.

_Who sent this? Where is it from?_ Kibum thought, still debating whether or not to open the message.

He took a deep breath and opened the message and found a message that said with more than one word:

Pictures

From: Eunhae

To: Bummie

Kibum scrolled down to find pictures of the couple. He laughed when he found them doing all these different expressions and faces; seriousness, anger, funny faces, faces of enjoyment, and many more.

Where were they? He scrolled down all the way underneath the pictures to find more words:

In Paris right now!

He didn’t know they left to another country. Why didn’t they tell him? His friends? His parents? No one had spoken a word to him. Kibum sighed deeply. He’ll put that on the “List of Thing That People **_Don’t_** Tell Him.”

He looked through the box; he stopped when he heard a soft knock. He walked towards the door nervously and then unlocked it. It was his parents and in his Mother’s hands was a box?

“Umma, Appa, is something wrong?” Kibum asked.

Mrs. Kim eyed the box, which was something Kibum noticed immediately.

“What’s in the box?” Kibum asked.

“Memories,” Mr. Kim said.

Kibum moved away from the doorway so his parents could enter the room. Once they had, Mrs. Kim had placed the box on top of her son’s bed and Mr. Kim opened the box. His parents moved away from the box so Kibum could look into it.

He found pictures in this box. It was pictures of a couple; two men; Minho and Kibum. They looked happy and like a real couple.

Why didn’t he feel happy with Minho, like he was in the pictures? Why doesn’t it feel real? Why was this relationship of theirs…one sided?

He sighed, but smiled. How could he not feel right or happy when in the pictures, it seemed as if he was.

“It’s Min and me,” He whispered.

“Yup. And we also have a big surprise for you!” Mrs. Kim squealed.

Kibum smiled brightly in confusion. What could his parents possibly have in mind for him? He flinched when he heard footsteps and noticed a figure at the doorway. He looked directly at the figure. It was Minho.

“Hello darling,” Minho greeted. He walked towards Kibum and once he was in front of him, he placed a kiss on his right cheek.

“We’ll leave you two alone.” Mrs. Kim said, smiling widely. Kibum panicked a bit when his parents made it to the door.

_No! No! Please don’t leave me here, _Kibum thought. He believed the older would do something he wouldn’t enjoy or like.

Minho and Kibum ended up looking at the pictures together (Kibum sat on the bed and Minho sat on the chair where the desk is.) Kibum found it a little friendly and luckily, Minho didn’t do anything that Kibum had in mind. Laughing, and chatting nonstop about the pictures. To Kibum, this time they were spending together, seemed like a friendship developing into something more.

Minho stopped chatting and laughing once he picked up a picture of him hugging Kibum from behind while his lips were touching Kibum’s cheek. Kibum found the silence strange.

“What’s wrong, Minho?” Kibum asked.

Minho placed the picture back into box and stood up to take Kibum’s hand, so Kibum could stand up.

Minho let go of Kibum’s hand and kneeled down on one knee. He dug out a little black box out of his left back pocket. Once the box was in his hands, he looked up at Kibum with a bright sweet smile.

“Kibum, I know this might seem a bit quick because of the accident and we’re still trying to catch up on things. But because of how long we’ve been together, _I_ think it’s time for this.” Minho explained. He opened the box, revealing a diamond ring.

Kibum widened his eyes and asked in shock, “Minho…what is this?”

Minho let out a chuckle. “I’ve put thought in this. I need you to know. I love you, and always will. So…Kim Kibum, will you marry me?”

There it goes again. The aching in him appeared again. Those words, he’s heard of them before.

_It was nighttime, someone was kneeling on one knee and in front of Kibum. _

_“Kim Kibum...will you marry me?” A familiar voice and the figure that was kneeling asked._

_“Yes,” Kibum answered. The person smiled in joy and placed the ring on Kibum’s fourth finger. _

_Will you…marry me? Marry me…_

_Kim Kibum…will you…marry me?_

_Will you marry…will you marry…**me?**_

Kibum was shock. Those words were being said by _him_.

Kibum looked into Minho’s eyes and mumbled, “Ye…yes.”

He didn’t remember smiling. He didn’t remember saying yes. He didn’t remember hugging Minho. He remembered nothing when Minho proposed.

But that night, that moment, that time, and that place, he did remember one thing. He couldn’t forget it. It was like ink on a paper; _permanent_ and _forever_. That memory.

He couldn’t believe it.

He couldn’t believe that Choi Siwon proposed to him…and he had said _yes_.


	7. Letting Go

Kibum woke up once he felt the warmth of the sun hitting his skin. The sunlight reflected because of the window. He woke up to grab his clothes, wash his face and brush his teeth, and then take a quick shower. After showering and getting dressed, he went downstairs.

He was greeted by two maids. He heard voices coming from the dining room. He looked at his right hand; a ring had been placed on his ring finger. It didn’t feel right. He remembered that…there was possibly another ring on his finger? A ring…but not this one.

He never noticed it, but he noticed the feeling. It seemed as if someone had taken it away from him. But who? Who’d take off something that seemed precious to him away?

He brushed off the feeling and entered the dining room. His parents, his so called in-laws, and Minho. All of their eyes met Kibum, which made him feel uneasy. He hated that feeling, he always got shy.

He knew exactly why they were all looking at him. He wasn’t surprised. Everyone in the room or home, were just people, but the thing that made Kibum ache and angry…was that he was a bride.

Siwon had gotten up early. He had just put Kiwon down for a nap. He surprisingly heard the door open, but he knew it had to have been his friends since they were the only ones that had the key to his home.

He exited out of Kiwon’s room and looked directly at the door to see which friends it was. It Yewook and Eunhae. Yesung and Ryeowook looked okay, while Donghae looked happy and Eunhyuk looked sick.

“What’s wrong with them?” Siwon asked the Yewook couple.

“Eunhyuk is sick or something and,” Yesung began and paused, allowing his lover to finish his sentence.

“Donghae believes that Eunhyuk is pregnant.” Ryeowook finished off.

“Is he or just sick?” Siwon asked in curiosity.

“Honestly, we don’t know.” Ryeowook replied.

Donghae ran towards them and placed an arm around Siwon’s and Yesung’s shoulder and exclaimed, “I’m going to be an appa!”

“Hae I told you…I’m sick.” Eunhyuk said weakly.

“Morning sickness is what they call it, love!” Donghae said.

“Ugh,” Eunhyuk groaned and placed a hand on his forehead. His lover’s last name was insane.

“So…how was the one day trip to France?” Siwon asked the couple. He found it ridiculous how the couple left a day before and they were already back. What a small trip?

“It wasn’t a big wedding. There were like fifteen people or less.” Donghae replied.

Eunhyuk gagged and covered his mouth and ran into the bathroom.

“I’ll go…check on him.” Ryeowook said, leaving the others that were in confusion besides Donghae.

“That’s our baby!” Donghae said, sniffing because of the fake tears.

“How are you so sure? It can possibly be the flu?” Yesung said.

Donghae shot a deadly glare at Yesung and gritted his teeth, “Don’t. Say. Our baby. Isn’t. Real.”

Ryeowook came out of the bathroom with a pale faced Eunhyuk and said, “We’re going to the hospital right now.”

“I want to see our baby too!” Donghae shouted out in joy.

“You driving?” Ryeowook asked. It wasn’t long before Donghae smiled and took Ryeowook and his lover out of the apartment. Being the only ones there, Yesung and Siwon exchanged glances.

“Man, he,” Yesung paused.

“Really wants a baby.” Siwon finished his friend’s sentence.

“You think Eunhyuk is really pregnant? Or…it’s disappointment for the fish?” Yesung asked.

“My opinion, I honestly think he could possibly be pregnant.” Siwon said nervously.

“Really, why?” Yesung asked.

“It’d be sad to think that it isn’t true. Having a child is a blessing, not a nightmare. Anyways, we won’t know until they come back.” Siwon said with a smile.

“Have you heard from Bummie, and see you know…what he’s up to?” Yesung asked, watching the latter get some coffee.

Silence was all that was brought into the room after Yesung’s words. By his own words he’d know it would turn out awkward. His words were awkward by these reasons:

One, it was about Kibum.

Two, Siwon couldn’t exactly hang around Kibum much.

And lastly, three, Siwon didn’t or likely wouldn’t answer quickly or at first.

“So…how are you doing?” Yesung avoided the topic, breaking the silence.

“Its fine, Yesung. I can tell you, we’re…far from each other, really far.” Siwon said.

“Of course, he probably lives super far!” Yesung said, trying to make it sound obvious, but his intentions were to lighten up the mood. It still seemed a bit awkward.

“Not that,” Siwon said, excusing himself for a moment. When he came back, he had Kiwon with him. “He’s with another man.” He finally blurted out.

He set the boy down to play with the nearest toys surrounding him; a bunny, fish, and monkey.

“Another man????!!!!???? Siwon you need to tell him! Do something! No one can live like that!!!!” Yesung shouted.

Siwon sighed and turned to look at Kiwon and spoke gently, “I love Kibum and Kiwon. I’d do anything just to protect them. Anyways, it’d be a mess if I told him. Yesung, he could’ve remembered something. I want him to remember it all. That’s the first step.

If that doesn't work, we’ll have to go to step two…tell him. He’d be so confused, he probably wouldn’t believe me. I love him. I want to be there for him. But right now, it’s not the time.” Siwon sad while continuing to look at his son, Yesung agreed by nodding.

In the meantime, Kibum was with Mrs. Lee and his umma at a tuxes store. Kibum had tried on many different white tuxedos. He found the styles interesting and likable, but finding a tux didn’t seem right or even just trying them on.

It’s as if he never wore a tux before, even though he knew he has sometime in his life, but for this occasion, it was just a huge mess. And the whole problem was how wearing a white tux didn’t feel right. As he continued trying them on, his Mother and Mrs. Lee squealed continuously.

Kibum got annoyed and wanted to stop with the whole “dress up.” As he examined himself in the mirror for the 100th time, his Mom and Mrs. Lee looked in amazement and awe, again.

“Eomma, Mrs. Lee, I think this is enough, don’t you think?” Kibum asked.

“Oh dear, you’re right! We should start with the other stuff!” Mrs. Kim exclaimed in joy.

“Ooooh! We should start getting more stuff done today,” Mrs. Lee agreed.

The two ahjummas paid for the tux, while Kibum avoided everything. They left the tux store and ended up going to many other fancy places. In the end, they went to shop for the flowers.

Mrs. Kim and Mrs. Lee were with a woman with a binder. They were examining some flowers while Kibum wandered off in the store, away from the rich women and flower lady.

White roses caught his eyes. He smiled as he touched the smooth, delicate, white petals. He took one and examined it with a smile.

The roses had him remembering when he had woken up after the first accident in the hospital. He found a bouquet of white roses with all the other flowers everyone had sent him.

Since there was no note, he had no idea who had brought them. He had believed it was Minho, but he couldn’t picture the male doing that. Not even his friends, he could see. The roses stood out because they were the only different ones. All of the others were colorful.

Must’ve been someone…close and special, someone who knew him better than his friends, parents, and Minho. But why not Minho? The man was his boyfriend?

Kibum noticed his Mother paying for tulips. Ugh. He’d walk down the _aisle_ with tulips, oh well.

He put down a rose and walked away, taking one last glance of the beautiful white roses. Afterwards, the ahjummas took Kibum to a fancy big restaurant.

Mrs. Kim eyed something and gave an angry look. She then stood up and smiled at Mrs. Lee and Kibum. “Kibum dear, Mrs. Lee, I’m sorry but I’ll have to excuse myself. Please, arrive home safely.” Mrs. Kim said, smiling sweetly, hiding how she really felt.

“Ne eomma, joshim.” Kibum replied while nodding. Mrs. Kim had left the restaurant finally.

Siwon was standing in front of a store; ahead of him was a fancy restaurant. He noticed his lovely wife, Kibum’s _Mother_, and another woman.

Now, Mrs. Kim was walking towards him. He groaned and faced her. She had slapped him in the face.

“What are you doing?! Spying on Kibum? Don’t tell me that you do this??!!! And that you’ll continue on!” Mrs. Kim said with anger.

“I wanted to check on him.” Siwon replied.

“Who gave you permission to do so? Did I say you can see him? Did my husband say so?” Mrs. Kim asked.

“Permission? From you? Or your husband? He’s my wife. I don’t need _permission_.” Siwon said.

“Want him to think you’re some kind of stalker? If you _really_ love him, why not leave?” Mrs. Kim asked seriously.

“What?” Siwon asked with confusion.

“You love him. You’ve seen how happy, he is with _Minho_. Have you not seen that he is happy with him? He’s happy. To live happily?” Mrs. Kim said. Siwon froze of the whole thought.

“I mean, don’t tell me that you _don’t_ want him you be happy? He’s happy with Minho. You want him happy, and now he is. Let him _go_.”

Siwon still couldn’t believe her words.

Letting Kibum go.

Letting his love go.

Letting his wife marry someone else.

Letting his child live motherless.

_Someone kill me now_, Siwon thought. 


	8. Key to Memories

Siwon stood frozen. Mrs. Kim’s words stopped him from doing anything. _Let him go_. He couldn’t let go of Kibum. He was Siwon’s best _friend_. He was Siwon’s _wife_. He was the _Mother_ to Siwon’s child. He was…Siwon’s _life_.

Mrs. Kim chuckled, “That got you, didn’t it?” Siwon looked into her eyes, as Mrs. Kim opened her eyes once more. “You wouldn’t let go. But listen to me, Choi.” She leaned close.

“You want Kibum to be happy? Your wish was granted. You wanted him happy, and he _is_!”

“He doesn’t—” Siwon said, but was cut off by the woman.

“Know about you and the _baby_? Doesn’t know about _you and him_?” Mrs. Kim asked and chuckled evilly. “There never was a ‘_you and Kibum_.’ It never was meant to exist, and that’s been proven by what’s happened to Kibum.”

Siwon had sadness filled in his eyes. She was right. In Kibum’s state those memories weren’t there. It was as if they never were, or they just were erased instantly. They weren’t where they used to be. Those memories were gone sadly.

“It’s not just the memories, but the Kibum who married you. The Kibum who wasn’t thinking right. The one who chose a bad man.” Mrs. Kim said, Siwon didn’t respond. He didn’t want to listen at all to what she was saying, but she was right.

Kibum doesn’t remember anything about him. The Kibum who loved him…_was nowhere to be seen_. Yes, Kibum was alive, but the who loved and knew Siwon…seemed dead and nowhere. Siwon couldn’t see him at all.

Kibum did choose a bad man to be with; at least that’s what Mrs. Kim and Siwon himself thought. Siwon blamed himself for so much; the reason to why they had split up for a while, Kibum leaving his home and friends, and when Kibum was in the car accident.

_Only if I had been there more_, Siwon thought.

“I’m going to get him back,” Siwon said in determination.

“Oh really? You’re that _desperate_, aren’t you? You want him all to yourself once again. Selfish, don’t you think?” Mrs. Kim said with annoyance.

Siwon was surely mad by her words. He didn’t own Kibum, but that young man who didn’t remember him was his _wife_! He didn’t need permission.

Why couldn’t a husband have the ability or opportunity to see his wife? It’s not like they were divorced or something. Kibum wasn’t a child either. Siwon understood that Kibum would need time to remember, but it was wrong if he didn’t get to see him and help him remember.

“Kibum is fine without you. He doesn’t need you since he can do better. Might as well give up, and you got what you wanted for a while. You got to kiss Kibum, you got to hold him in your arms, you got to marry him, and you got a child with him. You also got him where you had always wanted him to be; _happy_. I’ll make it crystal clear that we won’t be needing to see each other again, ne?” Mrs. Kim said and then turned away to leave.

Siwon stood there frozen in his place. He did get to live it all indeed. Be friends with Kibum, be in a relationship with him, get him back when he lost him, get married to him, and have a child with him. He did want Kibum happy.

The first thing he saw when he first met Kibum was his smile and that’s one thing he had wanted to see for the rest of his existence. That smile had been the start of when Siwon had entered Kibum’s life and when Kibum entered his.

_Little Siwon was sitting on a bench all alone. His hands were touching his arms because of the cold. He shivered once more. The sky was dropping white delicate frozen water known as snow. The only thing he loved about Christmas and winter was because that was during the time Jesus was born._

_Except for that reason, he hated the winter. Getting sick, missing school when the weather was really bad and the flu weren’t things he liked. If he’d get sick, he’d have to wait to get better so he could read his bible and go to church._

_He spotted a boy younger than him running around and playing in the snow. How could anyone love the winter? Siwon wondered how anyone could like this weather and season._

_He was surprised when he saw the boy approaching him. Once the boy was in front of him, he instantly introduced himself. Siwon noticed how happy this boy was. After the boy introduced himself, Siwon kept repeating “Kibum” in his head._

_“Wanna come and play?” Kibum had asked, which had made Siwon stop his world and his heart no more felt cold, but very warm._

_He didn’t feel lonely._

_A smile crept up to his face. Siwon had no idea what this feeling was and never had experienced it before, but he knew immediately that he loved it. This boy…who he believed was precious to him…made it all happen._

_“Wonnie? Are you coming to play?” Kibum repeated his question. Siwon felt even happier by how the younger said his nickname. He looked into Kibum’s eyes; in them, he was smiling. _

_“Wonnie?”_

_“I’d love to.” _

A tear fell from Siwon’s eyes as he remembered the memory he’d cherish and promise to never forget no matter what. He’d never forget the time he met the person he’d want to spend his entire life with. He’d _never_ let go of those memories; they were too precious.

He started walking as he thought of his wife. He didn’t notice where he was going, but he noticed to look and be safe. He had stopped to regain his strength. He ended up in the parking lot to get into his car and drive away.

Kibum ran all the way upstairs to his room; slamming the door. He couldn’t believe what he had just experienced—or what he would’ve a couple seconds ago. Minho—his fiancé had tried to undress him in his parents’ living room.

_Desperate perv! _Kibum thought.

He heard his name being called out by his fiancé, but he ignored him of course. He didn’t want to go back down there for any reasons or circumstances. He noticed something on his pillow. It was some wrapped up object and a pink paper note. He grabbed them both in his hands and read the note:  


_Bummie! Here! For you! _

_–Wookie, Hyukkie, Teukie, and Others!!!_

Kibum set the paper note down and unwrapped the object. He tilted his head when he found a key in his hand and a number in black engravings on the back: 248.

He wondered what the numbers stood for and wondered what the key was for; many things can be unlocked by a key. But what was _this_ key for? The strangest thing was…he felt as if he knew this number. Or he found it quite familiar as if he’s seen it before.

He snapped out of his thoughts when he heard a knock coming from the outside of his bedroom door.

“Who is it?” He asked softly wonder to himself if it was Minho wanting to apologize.

“It’s me dear,” Mrs. Kim said in glee.

“Umma, you’re back?” Kibum asked.

“Yes dear. Why are you cooped up in there? We’re going out to dinner. A French restaurant.” Mrs. Kibum said.

_Kill me now!_ Kibum shouted in his mind.

“Uh umma...I’m not feeling so good.” Kibum lied.

“Oh…how much does your stomach—wait! Did you and Minho do _it_?” Mrs. Kim said with curiosity at her question.

“N-no.” Kibum responded.

“Oh, well how bad do you feel? Must we call a doctor?” Mrs. Kim asked with a hint of worry and concern in her voice.

“Quite a bothersome, but nothing to _worry_ about. Spend time with my…future husband. Good to get to know people more these days, right?” Kibum said, trying to avoid questions.

“O-okay, well get some rest and feel better. Would you like your _fiancé_ to stay back and take care of you? Romantic!” Mrs. Kim said.

Kibum panicked and protested. “N-no! Not at all. I don’t want my future husband to get sick if it’s contagious or anything. That wouldn’t be good, now would it?” Kibum said.

“Oh okay, well take care of yourself. Bye!” Mrs. Kim said goodbye and Kibum bid goodbye as well.

He looked around his room. His eyes landed on a white little jewel box with three little drawers. He saw a part of paper from the top drawer. He took the jewel box and opened the first one and took out the paper and read it:

WHERE:

XXXXXXXXX Apartments

ADDRESS: XXXXXXXXXXX

ROOM: 248

Kibum tilted his head. The key for an apartment? He wondered why he had this information. He wondered where this place was…so he wanted to find out himself.

He changed into different clothes and grabbed the key and paper and exited his room. He had ended up taking up a bus to get to his destination. He wondered what this apartment held for him…

He didn’t know; but he wasn’t turning back, not now. He wanted to know—he was eager. He finally arrived at a familiar place. This was where _Siwon_ lived? He shrugged and looked around and then towards the budding with the apartments. As he walked in the hallway of the 4th floor, he came in front of a door engraved with this numbers: 248.

He took the key that he had placed in his pocket out and placed it in the keyhole. The door was unlocked now. As the door was unlocked, he hesitated.

_This isn’t even my home! This is breaking and entering. But, why did they send me this key for? Must…there must be a reason,_ Kibum thought.

He took a deep breath and pushed the door open and walked in. He realized so much of the stuff was familiar—the things he hadn’t noticed when he had come. He ended up walking through a small hallway to pass a white door that had the initials: CHOI KI WON.

He somehow didn’t pay any attention to that room, but he ended up heading near the familiar white door beside the door with the initials.

He grasped the doorknob and opened the door and entered the room he had once been in. He realized the closet wasn’t closed. He had approached it to close it, but he had spotted a plain white shirt. He took it off the hanger and held it in his hands. It happened once again. The pain and aching in his head. The _memories_.

_Siwon was wearing his original work suit since he had left work early and was on time for his wedding. Here he was holding his fiancé’s hands. The boy wearing a plain white shirt and boots smiled with his fiancé. They both had come to their wedding wearing a work suit and a plain white shirt._

Kibum fell to the floor. He panted and sweated. He didn’t know why memories came back to him and why…they seemed to take so much energy from him. Didn’t he have all his memories though? Why were there some coming to him? He knows his friends, his parents, his home and his own self, Minho, and…

His eyes widened.

Siwon.


	9. Anger

Siwon had picked up Kiwon from his parents’ house since they had wanted to spend time with their grandson. Once they had arrived back home, Siwon found the door open. He had just been out for a couple of minutes and he had locked the door too. Someone broke in? He knew he locked the door.

He was just walking on the 4th floor and found the door to his apartment open? Siwon cursed in his head, but asked God for forgiveness right away and wondered who had a key. That is if someone even broke in using a key.

When he entered his apartment, he saw someone else’s shoes? _Not mine_, Siwon thought as he walked into Kiwon’s room that he didn’t even realize his door was wide open. He set Kiwon down in his crib and walked out.

Once he had gotten out of Kiwon’s room, was when he noticed his door was open. He went into a closet that was only across Kiwon’s room and got out a bat. He walked slowly and quietly into his room. He spotted a figure on the floor holding his wife’s wedding outfit. Since the figure was looking down, he couldn’t see their face.

Siwon walked closer to the figure, “Who are you!?!” The figure jumped and looked up quickly. It was Kibum.

Siwon froze. What just happened? Why is it that Kibum was here? Questions ran inside of Siwon’s head. How did Kibum get here? When did he get here? But the question that gave Siwon hope was: _why was Kibum here_?

Did he remember something? Does he remember his soulmate? Did he remember his _real_ lover? Did he remember his husband? Did he remember those times they both had spent together? Did he remember _their love_?

Kibum stood up quickly without picking up the shirt, while looking into Siwon’s eyes. Siwon noticed Kibum’s red and puffy eyes. _Was he crying?_ Siwon thought in confusion and worry.

The younger bent down to pick up the plain white shirt and hanger. A smile crept onto Siwon’s face when he saw his wife picking up his own wedding outfit. He hid the smile when Kibum stood back up and looked at him.

“Sorry for intruding! No wonder why this place was so familiar?” Kibum said, feeling a bit relief. At least he wasn’t in some stranger’s house.

“In the present or past?” Siwon asked curiously.

Kibum seemed confused instantly since he raised an eyebrow, “Pardon?”

Siwon shrugged. “You know when we were talking, that’s familiar. But, do you recognize this from…_years_ ago?” There was hope in the tone in his voice. He hoped Kibum remembered. He hoped that the reason why he was here…was because Kibum remembered him.

“You know…when I came the last time…it felt a bit welcoming and familiar?” Kibum said while his eyes wandered around the room. The funny thing was, it was Siwon’s or just a regular room; it belonged to him and Siwon, it was _theirs_.

Siwon cleared his throat once he realized how Kibum’s eyes were wandering the whole room. “S-so may I ask…what brought you here?”

Kibum’s eyes immediately made their way back to the handsome young man. “Oh um…nothing really, I guess.” He didn’t know why, that was the truth.

“How did you get here? Also…why?” Siwon asked with a little force. He wanted to know why. He wanted to see…he wanted to know if his wife would come back to him.

Kibum felt uneasy. Yes, Siwon had the right to know how and why, but if he told Siwon everything he’d think he’s insane; him and Siwon married, and him carrying Siwon’s child? Siwon told him that they were close friends, but then again, why is it him that he doesn’t remember? Why Siwon? Why can’t he remember a close friend? Wouldn’t close friends remember each as if they were something _more_? Kibum was still so confused. He loved his friends. If Kibum were to lose one of his friends because of something he said, he’d feel like a parent losing one of their children; it’d hurt him that much.

He didn’t want to lose his friend. A close friend especially. It wasn’t worth it. Especially Siwon who was close to him; Kibum didn’t want to lose him.

But what if these memories he kept having was a sign? What if they meant something? What if…Siwon knew about these memories? What if…Siwon and him were actually lovers? What if…they actually got married and had a kid together?

Kibum shook his head. Once again, he reminded himself that he didn’t want to lose a friend, especially a close one like Siwon. Anyways, if Kibum didn’t answer the latter would find something off.

“Guess I just…_found_ the key?” Kibum lied simply. He had it. It was sent to him, he didn’t find it. _Good job Bummie. You’re totally going to jail for this_, Kibum thought as he found his lie quiet pathetic.

“You just found the key? No one gave it to you? You didn’t have it?” Siwon asked with a mix of hope and frustration. He had to know why Kibum was there.

“I didn’t have it.” Kibum said quietly. Siwon’s frustration flooded over his hope and happiness.

It all died down. Nothing. No more happiness. No more hope of Kibum remembering. In his head, he wondered about the frustration. Every time Kibum went to the hospital or noticed something _familiar_, it felt like Kibum was picking up the pieces and trying to place them back together like one big puzzle. But no. Kibum didn’t include Siwon or his name in his moments of remembering something or in the hospital.

Yes, when someone’s in the hospital, you’d be shock and sad. But not Siwon. He knew Kibum was healthy and strong, and would take care of himself and be careful. He always had high hopes that Kibum would remember him. But it’s just his imagination. Kibum wouldn’t remember him. Right now Kibum is in his own home with his wedding outfit in his hands. Siwon would have high hopes.

Kibum _found_ the key, but Siwon didn’t believe it. Maybe Hyuna gave it to him? But why? Hyuna doesn’t even know where Kibum lives. Unless she spied on him? Minho? No. Minho didn’t know Siwon as much as Siwon knew him.

Not Kibum’s parents. They’d make sure that Kibum avoided him. Maybe their friends? Siwon didn’t know but he knew that Kibum didn’t know where it was. He couldn’t really predict where exactly he was. Kibum felt the apartment being familiar to him, but he didn’t know he was in his own home where he had so much good memories.

Siwon felt anger in him. He had known many reasons why Kibum’s parents hated him but didn’t know why they did. Kibum couldn’t remember anything which wasn’t Kibum’s fault at all. It all happened because of him not being there when Kibum needed him. Only if he were there, right now his Kibum would be with him. He, Kibum, and Kiwon would be together.

Kiwon would have his umma and Siwon would have his wife he loved dearly. They’d be a happy family. Siwon wanted to guarantee it. Sadly, now it was clear to him. Even when Siwon was told he was able to see Kiwon, he thought Kibum was healing and resting. When he was allowed to see Kibum, he knew his wife would be fine and he’d want to see his child. But no.

“Who are you?” doesn’t sound like, “Siwon? Y-you here…where’s Kiwon?” Siwon was expecting it. He had real big high hopes. He didn’t expect his wife to ever ask who he was. Siwon knew, Kibum wouldn’t remember. He had thought it was just memory loss that could be recovered. The memories would come back, but it seemed very different from what he had expected.

Siwon looked annoyed and irritated, “_Why are you here_?” Kibum jumped by the tone in Siwon’s voice. Was Siwon going to press changes for breaking and entering? Kibum wasn’t stealing or breaking anything. His friends gave him the key, he didn’t have it. He didn’t even know where it led to.

“No specific reason. I’ll just leave.” Kibum said nervously, setting the shirt and hanger on the bed gently. Siwon felt sad instantly. His wife placed down the wedding outfit—his wedding outfit.

_He doesn’t even know that he’s married,_ Siwon thought.

Kibum was unaware. He didn’t know. He dated Siwon. He loved Siwon. He got married to Siwon and had a child with him. He knew nothing at all about those events that marked something big in his life. Siwon could only blame himself because he wasn’t there for his wife when he needed him. It was Kibum and Kiwon who needed him, and he wasn’t there.

“Why are you here?!?!” Siwon yelled with tears threatening to escape his eyes. As for Kibum, he was quite startled. It wasn’t long before Kibum could hear wails, which surprised him a bit.

_Sh**! Kiwon is here. Siwon is mad, which isn’t good. Why did I have to be so curious? Please clam down Siwon ah, I’m sorry for coming. It’s my fault, _Kibum thought as he recalled he was in someone else’s home.

“S-Siwon ah…calm down.” Kibum whispered and regretted it all. Kibum knew no one calmed down after being told to do so. 

“Why are you here?!?” Siwon repeated again, but in a lower voice which had Kiwon’s cries calm down luckily. Kibum was confused by the tears cascading from his eyes. Kibum could tell that Siwon was broken, sad and devastated. 

Siwon himself didn’t know why he was devastated. He had an answer but wasn’t sure if it fit with devastating. More and more tears fell; not cold, but hot. His anger got to him. His sadness, frustration, and devastation had taken over him. He hated this.

He didn’t like the person he was now. Yelling and crying. Sad and scary. Yelling at his wife for no reason. In his mind, he tried selecting a memory of Kibum and him. Kissing, hugging, whispering, “_I love you_,” sweet-talking, and being together. It was all in his head. Not Kibum’s. He could remember everything as if it were yesterday as for Kibum it’s as if it never happened. Why couldn’t Kibum remember? Will he one day? Will that one day be years from now? Or worse…will he _never_ get those memories ever again?

That thought haunted Siwon. He had a wife that didn’t remember him or their child. As more memories of Kibum came to him, more tears and anger welled up in him.

“Why are you here? Please…leave!” Siwon yelled once more, and Kibum didn’t hesitate. But before leaving completely, he took one last glance at Siwon and then ran out. He didn’t notice something from his pocket fell on the floor.

Siwon felt lonelier than ever; his friends, his family, all gone. Not there. He had Kiwon, but of course; he was just a baby.

Siwon was about to head to Kiwon’s room to calm him and down and make sure he was okay, but he didn’t notice the piece of paper on the floor, which had made him slip. He groaned while sitting up and picked up the paper, reading the red ink:

_Even women aren’t as BEAUTIFUL as you. Not even the models that walk the stage, not even the most feminine ones, you still beat them. I love you, my bride. _

_Love, Lee Minho._

_To, Kim Kibum._

_“God, forever let u be a good and happy couple.”_

Siwon’s sadness washed over the madness and the madness washed over the sadness; both going back and forth, but sadness won and took over Siwon’s soul. His hands shook which caused the paper to tear a bit. Hot tears fell from his eyes.

His heart ached. His body felt numb. His wife was receiving love letters from someone that wasn’t even him! His wife was receiving letters from the boyfriend that he had broken up with long ago. But not just that bothered him. Minho had written, “_My bride_.” Those words, the word “bride,” bothered him. Kibum was a bride, but not to Minho, but to Siwon.

Kibum was married to Siwon, not Minho.

He fell on his knees and sobbed hardly.

“_Please Bummie….please, please…I love you Bummie…please…remember me_.” 


	10. Just Imaging?

Eunhae, Kyumin, and Yewook had arrived at Sibum’s apartment. Kyumin arrived a few minutes before Yewook and Eunhae though while Yewook and Eunhae entered at the same time.

Eunhyuk looked and Donghae looked excited and kept squealing every five minutes which made people send him weird looks. Ryeowook watched over Eunhyuk while Yesung listened to the others with his arm wrapped around his lover’s waist.

Siwon hadn’t seen Yewook or Eunhae for a couple of days. Ever since Eunhyuk went for the “checkup.” Siwon could tell it was obvious. _Poor Hykkie_, Siwon pitied Eunhyuk.

The Hanchul and Kangteuk couple had just arrived.

“YAH, Lee Donghae! Stop jumping!” Heechul complained because of how Donghae was joyful.

“Hyukkie are you _for sure_ you’re with child? Or you gave him candy?” Ryeowook asked.

“Or agreed with naming your child after a fish in an animated movie?” Yesung asked referring to “Nemo” the movie Donghae loved. Because of the turtle boy’s words, everyone but the Eunhae couple laughed.

Siwon sat down on a chair while listening to his friends’ conversation. They knew. They knew about how he yelled at Kibum. He had told them. They had been shock and pitied the couple even more.

Leeteuk noticed the expression on the younger’s face; he was _obviously_ thinking about Kibum. The younger was also being quiet—which always meant something especially in the tragic situation he was suffering through. He felt bad for the couple dearly. He knew the family were going through pain.

Kibum was confused.

Siwon was wifeless.

And lastly, Kiwon was motherless.

Leeteuk nudged his lover’s arm which earned him a confused look from Kangin. Kangin could immediately tell Leeteuk wanted him to talk to do something about Siwon since his lover gestured to the quiet religious man.

“Hey, are you okay?” Kangin asked looking directly at Siwon. Siwon responded by looking at the direction towards Kangin.

Kangin could see the more sadness filling in the latter’s eyes as he stared deeply into them. The religious man’s eyes were still red and puffy. Kangin figured he had cried because how he frightened Kibum. Kangin couldn’t believe how the other could go through this—he was impressed to how Siwon was taking it and hadn’t yet gave up on his wife.

“Yeah, sure. I’m perfectly fine…I just found a love poem from the man who took my place. Yeah, I’m perfectly fine—scaring my wife and child. I’m actually better than fine.” Siwon said sarcastically.

Kangin groaned and punched his friend’s right arm playfully. “You really have to be sarcastic right now?”

Siwon stood up and placed his hands on his hips. “Well don’t you _all_ know I’m not fine? Why ask, ‘Are you fine?’ or ‘Are you okay?’ when you all know how I’m doing!” He yelled with anger.

“You’re lucky that Kiwon is with his grandparents. He would’ve wailed louder than you had yelled.” Leeteuk said with seriousness.

Kangin placed a hand on Siwon’s shoulder and sighed deeply. “We know you aren’t alright but we just want to know how you are beyond all that, you know. If you plan to commit suicide or do something stupid.”

Siwon seemed shock. “Why does everyone think I’m going to commit suicide or do something stupid?”

Kangin chuckled lightly. “Everyone isn’t perfect. Trust me—no one is.” Siwon agreed by nodding his head.

Sungmin stood up and smiled brightly at Siwon, “It’ll be okay Siwon-ah, just be patient. Bummie will come around soon!” Siwon sighed deeply hoping that the bunny man was right while the others believed him with no hesitation.

But could he wait until Kibum came around? Kibum was with his unreal family. The parents who raised him and the parents who hated Siwon and Kiwon were the people he now saw as amazing.

Not just Kibum’s parents, but the man who had stolen Siwon’s place. How could he live like this? Watching Kibum not only stay with his cruel family and being with the man he didn’t even love.

Siwon knew that Kibum knew Minho. He knew Kibum and the other had dated and his wife had only loved the man a little bit or at least tried loving him. The only thing there that was real was the care.

Siwon knew Kibum felt bad for breaking the man’s heart once he told him it was over.

But Siwon knew for sure Kibum didn’t _love_ Minho. But maybe Kibum had fallen for the other? The piece of paper he found from Minho, the word he didn’t want to see…_bride_.

Minho’s bride.

Was his wife going to be Minho’s?

Siwon couldn’t believe how things turned out. How things turned out to be…ever since he met Kibum. Because of being with Kibum he was hated by his lover’s parents. Because of a misunderstanding Kibum had broken up with him. Kibum being his again and then having to leave again to finish school. Kibum being in the accident which erased all the memories he’s had with Siwon.

Everything that had happened had Siwon’s heart breaking. Why it is Siwon’s heart was continuously breaking? Why was it that his love left him?

“One more week!” Mrs. Kim squealed as she took her cup from the tray that had been left on the coffee table.

Her friend, Mrs. Lee smiled brightly and sat on the white couch with a cup in her hand. She looked at her son-in-law with more brightness in her eyes. “You know Bummie darling, I can’t wait, really. You’ll be an amazing bride—an amazing wife to Minho."

Kibum felt bitterness grab onto his heart when Mrs. Lee said “Bummie.” It had been a little different for him. It had been last week when he left his “closest” friend. Why should he feel mad? If he had. He did go into someone’s home with permission though.

Kibum still wasn’t satisfied when his parents or Minho called him “Bummie.” He was okay when his friends said it—real friends and Siwon included. Yes, he loved it when _Choi Siwon_ said it.

Kibum was still so confused. Him having Siwon’s child and getting married to him? Also, him wearing that white shirt from Siwon’s closest?

But if he wore that shirt, got married to Siwon and had his child…it’d make it “his” closest too. _Did I live with him?!_ Kibum asked himself in shock.

What if it was true? But then again, was Kibum going crazy or just imagining it? Kibum was left with unanswered questions that he was too scared to ask.

But he was also getting married. If he did marry Siwon, have a child, and getting married again…that’d be considered as _cheating_! Siwon and Minho? Would he be two-timing? Kibum smirked at the thought. He didn’t know he was _so bad_. Disgusted by his thoughts, he shook his head and tried thinking of much more cleaner stuff.

“You okay dear?” Mrs. Kim asked as she watched her son’s actions.

“Huh?” Kibum responded with his eyes on his mother.

“You seem like you’re daydreaming or spacing out. Oh! Let me guess, thinking about the honeymoon? Well, I’ve got everything all planned—” Kibum cut his mother off immediately.

“No Eomma! I wasn’t at all thinking about the honeymoon. I also wasn’t told there’d be one?” Kibum said with a little bit of patience in his voice.

Mrs. Kim’s mouth dropped due to her son’s outburst. She did continue speaking though. “Omo! It was supposed to be…a _surprise_!” Kibum cursed under his breath wondering in his head, _Why does she have to be so difficult_?

“Well dear, if you want here’s the whole week just for you. Doing whatever—being a fiancé is stressing.” Mrs. Kim said. Before anyone could say anything, Kibum was gone.

Kibum wasn’t thinking about heading back to his parent’s house at all. He’d be fine as ever staying at a hotel. He wouldn’t have to worry about his parents or Minho at all—or the wedding.

He continued walking on the sidewalks of Seoul. He wandered into the stores and shops. Many had called him, “Mr. Kibum,” or “Mr. Kim,” but one woman had called him, “Mr. Choi.” Kibum looked at the young woman in confusion. The words, “Mr. Choi,” made him think of one person and one thought.

At first he had thought she was calling out to someone else, which had him turning around just to see no one but him in line. He had turned back to the woman just to ask.

“M-Mr. Choi?” He asked with hope that his thoughts weren’t true.

She smiled brightly and pointed at her nametag that read: JUNG NARI. “I’m Jung Yunho’s cousin.”

Kibum raised an eyebrow—confused. He snapped his finger just like someone would do when they remembered something. “Oh, Jung Yunho! He’s married to Kim Jaejoong?” He knew those two—they were his friends. Nari had nodded in reply.

“Ah, I guess you can say I’m Mr. Kim too or soon I’ll be known as Mr. or Mrs. Lee or something since I’m getting married.” Kibum explained with a brighter smile.

Nari tilted her head—looking confused. “Aren’t you already married?” Kibum’s expression quickly turned blank.

“A-already m-married? To…_who_?” Kibum asked with a low voice, almost a whisper.

Nari smiled brightly—immediately changing her expression. Her eyes turned bright. “Choi Siwon.”

Kibum’s heartbeat stopped. His whole world turned upside down as he just stood frozen in place.

He _wasn’t_ imagining things. 


	11. I Do or I Don't?

The moonlight was shining on the dark sky meaning it was definitely nighttime. In one of the big expensive apartments. In the last and highest floor—inside, a handsome, manly shirtless young man had a white towel wrapped around his waist and was looking out of his balcony from the bedroom.

He took a sighed deeply and went inside. Once he entered his room—or shared bedroom, he found a young feminine beautiful man lying on the bed. He had white flawless snow skin, raven hair, and dark sparkling doe eyes.

The young man who had entered the room glanced at the beautiful man—smirking and grabbing a smaller tall to wrap around his neck. He walked towards a small coffee table with a pile of white envelopes.

He took the pile in his and hands and looked through them. “Boo, is this the mail?”

The beautiful young man looked directly at the manly man. “Yeah, I went to check the mail while you were in the shower.”

The man looking through the mail raised an eyebrow once he saw the title of one white letter that was titled: To Jung Yunho ♥ Jung Jaejoong.

“Boojae, did you see the letter written with our names on it?” The young man asked the beauty lying on the bed. The snow white skinned man stood up and walked towards the other; he wore a plain white shirt, black skinny jeans, and wore white cottony socks.

“No, I just grabbed what was in there. Didn’t notice that one.” He replied to his lover.

The manly one opened the letter and read the letter—or invitation by the information.

** _To Jung Yuho ♥ Jung Jaejong_ **

** _Dear Jun Yunho and Jung Jaejong, ths is initatin to the cuple-to be._ **

** _Lee Min Ho and Lee (Kim) Ki Bum_ **

** _Date: 2/10_ **

** _Place: Love Light Plaza_ **

** _Hope yo can make it to the most beutiful moments in this wold._ **

** _Thank you._ **

The male with the letter in his hands had his eyes widening. “Kibum as in our friend Kim Kibum?”

The beautiful man smiled at his lover’s words. “No dear, it’s actually Choi Kibum.”

“Oh right, he’s married! But to…Choi Siwon. Did they get a divor—wait! They have a child together! Our friend is married, has a child, and now two-timing?! What is Kibum THINKING????!!!!!” Yunho yelled.

Jaejoong giggled. His lover must’ve forgotten. “Should I remind you that Bummie lost part of his memory due to the car accident he was in?” Yunho turned to his lover who walked back to lie down on their bed.

He tilted his head and chuckled sarcastically. “Don’t tell me that you’re going to just lie down and not be as shocked as me?”

“Yunnie, what can I do? What do you want me to do? I’m a nurse at that hospital Bummie was hospitalized in. This isn’t my business, now is it?” Jaejoong explained.

“Okay, it’s not, but he NEEDS to know! His husband is wifeless and his child—their child is motherless! Someone needs to tell him! It’s not like his memory will wipe out right after he’s been told.” Yunho said with seriousness, throwing the letter and stomping on it as if he were throwing a tantrum.

Jaejoong sighed deeply, “Such a drama king…like Chullie." He got up and walked towards the paper and picked it up.

“Did you notice my name was spelled wrong? I mean, the invitation looks fine, but why typos? Why would his parents make our invitations—their son’s friend—so badly?” Yunho asked.

Jaejoong walked towards Yunho, “Yunnie.” He paused to lean close to his lover’s ear and whisper, “they never liked us.”

Yunho turned to look directly at his beautiful lover. “WHAT!!!????? You never told me? I sent them—we gave them gifts and they don’t like us??!!! We were nice to them! And they don’t like us??? Why did you find this unimportant to tell me?”

“Well we weren’t there for ‘Sibum’s’ anyways Bummie wants us there. We’ll be there for…M-Minbum? Yeah, I wonder if Wonnie knows of this. Wonder what his reaction would be. I have a feeling he has no clue about this.” Jaejoong said.

“YET, Jae, YET! He’ll know soon. Either someone telling him or worse! Meeting Bummie and seeing the NEW ring.” Yunho said.

Jaejoong bust out in laughter. “Yun, calm the f**k down. Geez, it’s not like Kibum won’t find out. Someone’s going to tell him…maybe not right now, but I do think it’ll happen at just the right time—the perfect time.”

“Oh really and tell me! When is the ‘perfect’ time, my love?” Yunho asked.

Jaejoong smirked as he thought about Yunho’s question and his answer. He smiled and clapped his hands, kept them together and looked into his love’s eyes. “Maybe…at the wedding?”

Siwon was looking forward—nothing in particular. He was sitting down on a bench in the park. It was supposed to be his special day and he hadn’t expected celebrate his birthday like this. Even this one. He had his son…and his wife.

That’s what he wanted.

All that he wanted for this day.

He had a wish already. He didn’t need to think about it unlike others. They’d be in front of candles, think and then blow. Siwon wasn’t like that—he knew. He knew what he wanted. But why ask for that? He laughed bitterly. Thinking of how stupid it’d be to wish for that.

Wishing to have Kibum by him? Wishing to have Kibum with him now? He didn’t think it’d happen now. Even the letter in his hand told him that. One scan at the piece of paper; that’s all I took—one glance. He remembered getting this paper a week ago.

FLASHBACK:

_Siwon was driving back home from work on Tuesday. Once he had entered his apartment, he realized that he wasn’t alone in there. His friends were there; most likely all of them. Two friends that he hadn’t seen in a while were also there. They all looked sad or serious._

_They didn’t smile or greet him? Which was completely off. He raised an eyebrow and asked, “Yunho…Jaejoong?” He said once he realized the familiar couple._

_Kangin stepped forward, “Siwon we got…something important to tell you.”_

_“What is it?” Siwon asked in a worried tone. They all seemed serious and not joking at all—it had to be big. Jaejoong stepped forward and held out a piece of paper to him._

_Siwon looked into Jaejoong’s saddened eyes. “J-Jae, what is it?” Jaejoong looked down and whispered, “You need to read it.”_

_Siwon took it and looked at all of them before reading. Once he felt the fear and worry well up even more in his stomach, he read._

_His eyes widened, which caused all eyes to lie on him. Suwon fell onto his knees, crying. Siwon had the strength to stand back up and dash out of his apartment. He had left everyone—all his friends confused._

_He had run all the way to the Kim mansion. He had met eyes with Mr. and Mrs. Kim who had exited their home. A bodyguard had stopped him from coming near the couple. He had left being unsuccessful. As Wednesday came, then Thursday, then Friday, then Saturday, and lastly Sunday, he had tried to go back to the mansion just to fail once again_.

END OF FLASHBACK

Here he was now, in a tux, sitting on a bench in the park with Yunho’s and Jaejoong’s invitation at the in his hand. No tears fell from his eyes, but he was devastated indeed. He didn’t know what to do. He loved Kibum, but why get more confused?

It wouldn’t do anything but confuse the younger even more.

He looked up at the sky, “Why…why him? Why me? Why us out of a million of people?”

Siwon continued to look at the sky. Everyone was okay with them besides Kibum’s parents, of course. Their friends were perfectly fine. He didn’t notice someone sat beside him, “Hey Wonnie.”

He looked from the sky to the person who was now sitting beside him. It was Jaejoong—a good friend he knew he could trust.

“Shouldn’t you be with Yunho…at the ceremony?” Siwon asked as he looked down at his shoes.

“Yunho is there—waiting for me, saving me a seat I believe. I decided to see and think, why are you here?” Jaejoong said.

“I’m not going invited or not.” Siwon said.

Jaejoong smiled. “Because you’re going to see something you don’t want to see?”

“Obviously watching your lover marry someone else is a good show, right? Worth watching and being happy for?” Siwon said sarcastically and felt bad. He never liked being bitter.

“Don’t be such an a**hole to me. I know how it feels.” The latter said which surprised Siwon. What did he mean by “knowing how it feels”?

“Oh really? You’ve went through your lover losing his memory? Your one and true love not knowing who you are?” He asked with quirked eyebrows.

Jaejoong sighed deeply and shook his head. “Not as bad as you, but…the whole arranged marriage thing. My true love had almost been forced to marry that who*e, Jung Jessica.” The name of the person painted a clear picture to Siwon. He knew that name was familiar.

“Same last names? Strange.” Siwon said.

“Yeah, but they’re not related—I wished they were at that time though. Their parents had arranged their marriage ever they were young since they were good friends—they also thought it’d be a good idea to expand their company. Yunho always knew about it, but I didn’t know anything about it at all. It’s like from the beginning our relationship would just turn into a wrecked ship that’d sink deep down to the ocean. He let me figure out—him leaving to Jeju Island which meant we were over.

I couldn’t believe it one bit. Chunnie and Minnie told me where he was luckily. I felt so stupid not knowing. I almost felt like he meant to do this—as if playing with my heart. I loved him and I didn’t want to let him go so I took a plane to Jeju Island. It was raining that day, I remember every bit of it. I thought it was stupid if I went—I’d be a humiliation, but I couldn’t let him…I couldn’t let him go. Jessica and I both loved him, but he loved me. I couldn’t…I just couldn’t let him go. I had opened the church doors right after the priest had said, ‘Does anyone object?’ I shouted that…I loved Yunho and couldn’t let this happen. I told him everything.”

FLASHBACK

_Jaejoong was all soak and wet. He was right in front of the two white doors that belonged to the church. He felt hesitation well up inside of him. Right when he was about to grab the handle, he thought if he regretted coming. Right now the two things that awaited him were embarrassment and Yunho._

_There was a possibility that Yunho respected his parents’ wishes and went on with the marriage, or—only a fantasy it seemed—stay with him. He had no idea what his fate would end up being._

_What if his fate turned about being something he hadn’t wanted? He did want Yunho back, but then again, not everything turns the way you want it to be. If Yunho was to respect his parents’ wishes and not be with him—and they’d really be over—he’d be devastated indeed. Then again, he could only fantasize for him to disagree and come with him back to Seoul._

_He could only hope and wish things wouldn’t turn out bad. He could only hope, wish, and pray. This time, at this moment, he hoped God would answer his prayers._

_No matter how much hope he did or didn’t have in him, he grabbed the two handles and pulled them to open the door widely. Saving his relationship was a risk that he had taken._

_People stared at him. Of course, who wouldn’t male or female? He was beautiful, and strangely, he wore white and it wasn’t even his wedding. Although he wasn’t properly dressed since mud was on his shirt and jeans and he was soaking wet. He didn’t pay attention who those who stared and only looked straightforward to look at the groom—Jung Yunho, his one and only true love._

_The handsome young man was dressed like a groom of course. He wore a black tux and his hair was styled neatly and he wore fancy black shoes—he looked like a handsome god._

_The stares, the laughs, the gasps never stopped—it didn’t stop Jaejoong at all. He was already walking down the aisle—walking towards Yunho, the bride, and the priest. He stopped when he was only a couple of inches away from the man who he had come there for. Yunho seemed as shock as everyone else was._

_“Yunho…I love you no matter what. I know why you’re doing this—making others satisfied besides yourself. You’ve never been selfish, but now you have every right to be. Money is all that matters to all of them.” His last words had made everyone gasp. Yunho’s parents had gotten mad by his comment of course._

_Yunho’s mother was the first to speak, “Take this nobody away!” Yunho stared at everyone and then at the priest._

_“Do you object?” The priest asked the beautiful feminine man who had nodded his head._

_“Take him—” Yunho had immediately cut his Appa off._

_“Please, you may speak.” He said to his lover who he had seen entered and interrupted this hell of a wedding._

_“I was clueless the whole time, and when you left I thought your love for me faded away like fog. But once I found out why…those doubts erased as quick as they were written in my mind—you stilled loved me.” Jaejoong explained._

_Jaejoong took Yunho’s empty hands in his and looked deeply into those brown orbs that he loved seeing. “I’ve made my choice to love and be with you, now it’s your time to choose.” Yunho stared at everyone and then looked back at the beauty who he did love._

_“I didn’t tell you because I’m a coward—a fool. I should’ve been the one to tell you everything instead I left and broke something important to the both of us—our relationship.” Yunho explained._

_Jaejoong placed his left hand on Yunho’s cheek and smiled brightly, “You’re my fool.”_

_Yunho chuckled lightly and looked towards the priest. “This wedding won’t continue on anytime soon or later.” Mr. and Mrs. Jung stood._

_Mrs. Jung looked at all of the guests and smiled, “This wedding will be postponed. It’s fine, it’ll con—”_

_“No! This wedding won’t EVER continue. Jaejoong and I love each other and will spend our days together—forever.” Yunho cut his mother off with seriousness in his tone._

END OF FLASHBACK

Siwon tilted his head due to confusion. He’s never been told this story.

Jaejoong smiled and looked at him. “Have you ever heard the phrase, ‘If you want something you got to get it yourself,’ or, ‘Follow your heart wherever on Earth it takes you’?”

Siwon nodded in reply.

“That’s what I did; I followed my heart and got what I wanted. Since I loved Yunho I went to Jeju Island to get him back. I love him.” Jaejoong said.

Siwon shut his eyes and nodded. “You love him, don’t you?” Siwon opened his eyes widely and nodded in reply.

“Well you love him. You have cared and loved him ever since. You’ve suffered watching him move away from your arms into someone else’s. You’ve protected him from confusion too damn much. For that, don’t you deserve to have all that pressure pulled from you? Or at least a _reward_?”

“A reward?” Siwon looked at him as if he were crazy.

Jaejoong nodded his head. “Yeah. You know _him_?”

“No. I can’t. He’d be even more confused.” Siwon said.

“Don’t you ever think about telling him the truth?” Siwon didn’t answer. Jaejoong placed a hand on Siwon’s shoulder, “if you want something…you _got_ to get it yourself.”

The beautiful flawless snow skinned feminine man got up from the bench and walked away to leave Siwon in his thoughts.

Wouldn’t all of this make it harder for Kibum? But Siwon had suffered so much. Lying would be worse; luckily he hadn’t said anything was his case. Living and not knowing you’re married or have a child?

Siwon couldn’t allow that.

Kibum seemed rather nervous. He had his white tuxedo on with his hair styled. He looked amazing indeed. He should be happy like other brides would be especially since it’s his “big day” though he wasn’t at all joyous unlike his parents and Minho. He was rather unhappy, but couldn’t necessarily understand _why_.

All the new information in his head he had found out; it all didn’t process right. It didn’t make sense to him at all. He was still as ever confused. Everything was so confusing to him. Was he really married to Siwon? Kibum shook his head because of the confusion.

The door to the room opened and made the maids look at the door. Mrs. Lee and his mother had entered the room with smiles on their faces.

“Oh Bummie! Can you believe it? You’re getting _married_!” Mrs. Kim squealed in joy.

He was able to pull off a fake smile that obviously fooled the two women. “Yes, I am in joy.”

“Oh darling…” Mrs. Lee said, almost tearing up.

“It’s time!” Mrs. Kim exclaimed, cutting Mrs. Lee’s tears and words. Kibum brightened his fake smile which had his mother tearing up.

_Really_? Kibum thought to himself.

“It’s okay, it’s okay. Let’s going now! Everyone’s _ready_!!!” Mrs. Lee exclaimed with happiness.

Kibum cursed under his breath; he hadn’t figured out anything or placed the random puzzle pieces together and here he was—on his way to marry someone he wasn’t even sure he really loved.

Kibum followed the two women out of the room. He was the bouquet of chosen pink tulips that hadn’t caught his attention unlike the white roses. He took heavy long steps wishing in his head that this event would happen another time and not _now_.

They finally arrived where all the guests were. He was near the doors of course just waiting to go down the aisle. His was Appa was right there waiting for him with a smile and his hand extended out for him. Seeing his Appa like that made him freeze and find this disbelieving.

_Kibum walked forward alone until he was by his soon to be husband._

Kibum placed his left hand on his temple and shut his eyes closed wishing the pain in his head to erase. It was once again another memory—another memory that hurt his head and soul.

Kibum thought of that specific memory as a dream. The dream looked as if his family wasn’t at all there for him or was with him. In this dream or memory, neither of his parents were walking him down the aisle that lead to the person he was about to spend his life with. But right now, it was nice knowing his Appa accepted him.

Kibum shook his head and walked towards his father to lock their arms together like a bride and her father. It looked as if they were ready to walk down, but a part of Kibum just didn’t want to move an inch, though right now it was time.

As he walked down the aisle, he looked at the corner of his eyes at the guests. He saw many of his parents’ friends and family, and many from the Lee family. He was happy to see the familiar faces belonging to his dear friends.

His Appa let go of him once they were in front of the groom and priest.

He felt it.

He knew it.

He was ready.

He knew that he was risking something.

But did people think it was worth it? No. Maybe they wouldn’t think it was worth it? Maybe he was just being selfish? But he knew what he was doing _was_ worth it.

He was running and running until he got to his destination. He avoided the stares and whispers. Luckily he was in too good shape and was good at running that he was able to continue on. He had something important to take care of right now.

No matter what people said or did.

He’s following his heart.

He’s making his decision.

He had made it to the plaza to see Kibum. He wasn’t going to allow his wife marry someone else especially if they both knew the bride didn’t at all love this groom he was about to marry. Siwon wasn’t going to stay and watch the “newlyweds” walk out happily and be, _Just Married_.

He wasn’t going to watch and see the beautiful fake wedding. Just like Jaejoong, Siwon was going to do the same.

Take what belongs to him and follow his heart.

“We are brought here today in matrimony,” the priest began, “by the love and feelings between these two lovely people.”

Siwon ran upstairs to the destination he wanted to get to.

“Lee Minho, repeat after me,” the priest said as he looked towards the groom. “I, Lee Minho, promise to love, you, Kim Kibum, in sickness and health and rich or poor.”

Minho smiled brightly at the bride and repeated, “I, Lee Minho promise to love you, Kim Kibum, in sickness and health and for rich or poor.”

The priest looked towards the bride, “Kim Kibum, repeat after me,” he paused and continued on. “I, Kim Kibum, promise to love you, Lee Minho, in sickness and health and for rich or poor.”

Kibum repeated, of course, and with hesitation, “I, Kim Kibum…p-promise to love you, Lee…Lee Minho, in sickness and health and for rich or poor.”

“Do you have any vows prepared for each other?” The priest asked the couple. Kibum felt a little bad since he hadn’t prepared anything. It seemed the groom did though.

Lee Minho took a deep breath. “I, Lee Minho, will forever think and love you, _Kim Kibum_. I will always care about you and stay by your side willingly.” Minho earned awes from the guests.

Kibum could only nod his head and try to smile for real, but there wasn’t any happiness in him yet and he feared that there wouldn’t be anytime soon or later.

“Do you, Lee Minho, take Kim Kibum to be your wife? The one you’d love and stay by your whole life, and promise to love him till death do you apart?” the priest asked the groom.

Minho smiled even brighter and nodded his head and replied softly, “I do.”

The priest turned to face the bride, “Do you, Kim Kibum, take Lee Minho to be your husband? The one you’d love and stay by your whole life, and promise to love him till death do you apart?”

Kibum swallowed hardly, now it was his turn. “I…I…”

The sound of doors being slammed to the walls was heard. Everyone looked back to see a handsome young man at the doors while panting—which made everyone gasp.

It was Choi Siwon.

He started walking down the aisle towards the bride, groom, and priest.

“Please take him away,” Mr. Kim whispered in a security guard’s ear.

Two bodyguards came dashing towards Siwon and started pulling him away from where he was heading.

“Sh*t! Sh*t! SH*T!!!!” Yesung shouted in worry.

“Damn, this is getting good.” Heechul whispered loudly.

Yunho turned to look at his lover beside him—a smirking Jaejoong whispering, “_I was right_,” before taking a sip of his glass of red wine.

“I object! I object! I OBJECT! I OBJECT!!!” Siwon shouted.

“Um…we weren’t there yet, but…he may speak if he does object. We were near that part”,” the priest said.

Mr. Kim groaned and because of the priest’s words the bodyguards loosened their arms and stopped what they were doing.

“I have a question for the bride,” Siwon said as he looked directly at his lover he had missed dearly.

Kibum removed his eyes from everyone else and looked at Siwon—the person he had been wondering about. “What is it?”

“Do…do you love him?” All of the eyes in the room faced Kibum which made his cheeks heat up.

“Get him out immediately!” Mrs. Kim shouted which had the bodyguards going back to what they were originally doing.

“Stop!” Everyone gasped once they heard those words coming from the bride’s mouth.

Kibum’s eyes were threatened with tears. “_I…I don’t love him_.” 


	12. Why Do I Know Now?

It was another beautiful day—a wedding day took place today; the 10th of February. Sadly, people were exiting the plaza, but why? A beautiful wedding was taking place and it seems that someone had ruined it.

Choi Siwon.

But did he have a good reason to ruin this beautiful fake day? Yes. Getting what _belonged_ to him back was worth ruining the fake wedding.

Sibum’s friends were outside of a room where the couple, Minho and his parents, and Kibum’s parents were inside. Everyone was pretty confused and surprised while many others weren’t.

Yunho and Kangin were arguing while Heechul drank and drank continuously while Jaejoong sat with a smirk on his face—he knew he was right.

“Can you believe that!? Kibum was about to say, ‘I do’ until SLAM! Siwon arrived.” Yunho exclaimed.

Heechul drank one shot before speaking, “Hey, it was a pretty good show if you ask me. I’d rate it five stars. Trust me, the drama happening in the other room you must rate five stars!”

Yesung stood, “Can you really believe it? Total sh*t was going on! I didn’t expect him to come.”

“_We_ didn’t expect him to come. But did we really think this day would end with Kibum with a new last name and his parents as a happy as a child getting candy?” Jaejoong said.

“Jae is right. Something was _going_ to happen—like it or not. Something or someone was going to ruin this charade obviously.” Kangin said taking a seat next to Leeteuk.

“Yeah, Siwon was going to make sure that Kiwon would get his Eomma back!” Ryeowook cheered cutely.

“Let’s all hope no one is hurt by the end of the day.” Leeteuk said.

“You think Siwon is going to be punched or something? Or some fight will start?” Kyuhyun asked with a small hint of worry for his hyung.

“Maybe Minho or Siwon will start—Minho might leave since Bummie doesn’t love him. Let’s hope Siwon doesn’t get hurt—he’s been put through too much already.” Kangin said.

Kibum was sitting down on a white couch beside Minho. Siwon was sitting down on a chair that was away from the couch. The Lee’s were sitting down on chairs; Mrs. Lee was crying while her husband was trying to calm her down. Mr. and Mrs. Kim were standing; talking and discussing matters with Kibum.

“Saying ‘I don’t love him,’ right after about to say ‘I do’??!!! Bummie this wedding has been ruined by him!” Mrs. Kim said and pointed at the young and handsome man sitting down in a chair.

Kibum stood up, “No it’s not his fault. Because of him…I’ve admitted and now know,” he paused and turned to Minho. “That I don’t and will never love you the way I once did.”

Minho stood up from the couch and walked towards the door to open it and slam it—storming out. His parents followed out. The “would’ve” been bride couldn’t help but feel guilty, but at the same time not guilty.

“Hey, if you ask me,” Yesung said and added, “are they going to continue?”

Heechul chuckled bitterly, “Babo! Have you not seen everything? Are you blind or deaf? People are leaving…it’s kind of sad. So much money,” He paused to take a sip of wine, “is all going down the drain.”

“True, why continue with something unreal? It’s hopeless to continue. Kibum made his decision. He’s not getting married. Good for him, Siwon, and also for Kiwonnie.” He paused to take a breath, “sadly for Mr. and Mrs. Kim…now all of what they worked for is going down the drain.” Jaejoong explained, completing his explanation.

“Well, if everybody’s going adios! We should leave too.” Henry said.

“What about Bummie and Wonnie?” Ryeowook asked innocently.

Yesung grabbed his lover’s hand, “They’ll be okay, love.”

“Why not grab a few drinks from a bar?” Kangin asked, smiling nervously. Everyone’s attention went to Heechul who slammed something on the table.

The wine glass that was in Heechul’s hand was now in pieces on top of the table, “Yes! Some shots wouldn’t be bad.” Everyone but Heechul rolled their eyes because of the diva.

They all walked out, but since Ryeowook had a sweet heart, he left a note for Siwon and Kibum and then left with the others. They all went out to drink except for Eunhae since Eunhyuk was pregnant and of course, Donghae wouldn’t allow him to enter anywhere or any place having to do with alcohol.

Since the Lee family was gone, and so were the Kims, plus Siwon, the plaza was now being filled with other occasions. Kibum had ridden with his parents back to their home.

Knowing he had to talk with the young man, Kibum had texted Siwon to come. He knew his parents were angry at the man, but Kibum felt like if he talked with Siwon…he’d be better. He had decided to wait outside for the young handsome man since he knew his parents wouldn’t greet him nicely if they saw him.

Once he had arrived, the two smiled at each other and greeted each other and went inside. Kibum had regretfully left Siwon with his parents since he had to get out of his “wedding clothes.” He couldn’t deal with anything to have to do with the wedding, which is why he dashed up the stairs to get dressed out of the tux.

Again, here he was. Sitting down in front of the people he despised. They didn’t like him; he could care less for them as well. They hated him. They hated heir grandchild. He had every reason to resent them.

“Here you are again, Choi.” Mrs. Kim said, “Was exactly like the first time, just that time you were weak.” Mr. Kim added to his words.

“Weak? You call me weak? What I did back there was—” He cut off.

“STUPID! How dare you crash this beautiful moment? Do you know you embarrassed not only Kibum, but the entire KIM FAMILY??!!!! As well as the Lee family! I don’t know how your parents have a son like you; disgraceful, selfish, an embarrassment!” Mrs. Kim said.

Siwon looked at both of them directly, “Maybe I’m all of that, but I’m not the _only_ selfish one. I was getting my wife back. If anything you two are the selfish ones.” They didn’t notice.

“Selfish? Us? And why is that, Choi?” Mr. Kim asked.

“Having your son marry someone you wanted him to marry. Marry someone he doesn’t even love!” They didn’t notice.

“How would you know Kibum didn’t love Minho? Did you spy on them?” Mrs. Kim asked.

“I know. Who did he date? Who was he with long? Who did he actually _marry_?”

“Our son didn’t know what he wanted,” Mr. Kim said.

“Oh really? He seemed sure when he said, ‘I do,” and kissed me back.” They didn’t notice.

“Wo cheated on him? Who caused that pain? Who took a knife and stabbed his heart more than a hundred times?! Who let that happen?” Mrs. Kim asked.

“Funny, all your _beliefs_ went into that sentence of yours. I am Kibum’s husband.” They didn’t notice.

“I am his lover.” No one noticed.

“I am his protector.” No one knew.

“I am the one he wanted.” They didn’t know.

“I am…the father to our child.” They didn’t notice.

His eyes widened. He knew. He now knew. He now believed. How it shocked him that…it was all true. He at least knew the truth. His hand gripped tighter on the stair rail. No one knew he was listening. That he was there. No one noticed him.

He walked slowly downstairs before he knew; he was at the door ay already. “What?” He now had everyone’s attention. He was in shock as well. He wanted to know everything. He wanted to know…how he was married to Siwon.

“Ki-Kibum…” Mrs. Kim stuttered.

“What…why didn’t you tell me? Eomma, Appa…if I was married already…and I had a c-child and you let me marry Minho…why did you do that? It doesn’t just hurt or affect me…it also does for Siwon and…our child. Why would you do that to _me_? Your son-in-law? And your _grandchild_?” Kibum asked, he received no answer from his parents.

“Why did you want to marry Minho if I was already married?” Kibum asked with disbelief in his voice.

“Dear, you had someone perfect enough to marry until…he came back telling you things you wanted—” Mrs. Kim was cut off.

“Telling him the truth—telling him what really happened.” Siwon said.

“If anything you must not like Siwon, do you?” Kibum asked his parents, this time really wanting the answer.

“He was the wrong choice—someone who was better known as a friend than ever a lover.” Mr. Kim said.

“Well he isn’t, is he? No, he isn’t. He’s more than a friend. You didn’t even like him being friends with me, did you?” Kibum asked with a tone of anger in his voice.

“Kibum ah—”

“No! Siwon is not just a friend. He’s more than that. And somehow…I didn’t know or remembered that…I don’t know why or how I didn’t know all of this. While I didn’t know, you told me things that weren’t true. Siwon was a friend, and Minho was my lover? Now I know the truth and I’m going to live with the truth!” Kibum said. He grabbed Siwon’s wrist and led him outside of the house.

He’d be lying to himself if he said he now knew the truth. Because for one thing, he didn’t know _why_ or _how_ he doesn’t remember being with Siwon or having a child. Maybe that’s why there was a huge gap in his memory?

Here they were, the two young men sitting down on a bench at a park. A wave of silence was between the two.

“I’m sorry,” Siwon said.

“For what?” Kibum asked.

“For not telling you the truth. You the right to know—know you have a child, you’re married, and also…why you were in the hospital.” Siwon said.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Kibum asked.

“I was in shock when I realize you didn’t remember me…really I was, but I didn’t want you confused.” Siwon explained.

“That’s pretty understanding, it just bothers me that I know now. This time, especially the time I was going to marry Minho. The time when I was about to say, ‘I do.’ Why do I know now?” Kibum said.

Siwon smiled knowing the answer. He knew it like the back of his hand. He knew exactly why. He didn’t need to think. He knew—no thoughts.

“Because I wasn’t going to give my wife away.”


	13. Choi Kiwon

After talking together, it had gotten a bit quiet, but the questions Kibum had asked and Siwon’s answers made Kibum feel guilty.

“So the mother to him…is _me_?” Kibum asked looking at Siwon and tilting his head to the right.

Siwon knew who _him_ was. _Him_ was someone who Kibum also overheard about. Kiwon.

Siwon remembered that he had told Kibum that Kiwon had another mother when they were locked in his bedroom by his own friends. He remembered why he didn’t tell Kibum too—so his lover wouldn’t get even more confused.

Kibum had figured that the child that Hyuna claimed was hers and Siwon’s, but once Siwon had clarified she wasn’t the mother, Siwon had told him his _boyfriend_ was the mother.

He wanted to know why Siwon had said that Kiwon belonged to someone who had left their and lover? Why did Siwon describe him as someone who _left_?

“Why did you say I left both of you? I might’ve lived somewhere else…but you could’ve told me?” Kibum asked softly.

Siwon took a deep breath and tried to relax his shoulders, “Your _original_ self left us. You weren’t able to remember me and our beautiful memories together or that you had a child. You didn’t look at me like you used to once you woke up, but I don’t blame you. It was like the _real_ you as gone, that’s all, you know?”

Kibum understood, but he felt really bad. He wished he could remember all these memories he's had with Siwon, but he just couldn't. He couldn't really force himself to remember. He felt bad that Siwon only had the memories, the good times, and the beautiful moments while Kibum just didn't have any of those memories anymore. It was as if those memories were only fantasies and dreams, but they were real and Kibum believed that. 

Siwon stood up and smiled at Kibum, "Come on, everyone is probably at home, but I want you to see someone. This someone would be excited to see you." Kibum nodded with a smile and stood up as well, and then followed Siwon as they walked away from the bench. 

As Kibum was inside of the taxi with Siwon, he couldn't help but keep his eyes attached to the window. Even though he trusted Siwon, he had clearly heard what his _husband _had told the driver, but he had just wanted to know where he was going at least. He knew where he was now. The buildings and stores were recognizable. He'd been here before. He knew exactly where they were when the vehicle stopped. Siwon's apartment. He smiled knowing that he was somewhere safe. But being here had also brought back the memory when he had went to Siwon's apartment—someone claiming someone else's child and the yells. He shook his head, not wanting to think about those times.

Once the two were out of the taxi, Siwon had led Kibum to the building and by no time, they were in front of Siwon's apartment door. When the two entered, Siwon had told Kibum to stay inside while he'd be right back; leaving the apartment to go outside. Kibum had taken off his shoes of course before sitting down on the couch in the room.

When he sat down, his eyes wandered the room that was likely the living room. He couldn't help but feel the curiosity flow inside of him. He didn't want to wander, but he was invited. He didn't want to invade someone's priavy, but Siwon was his lover and Kiwon was his child. But did Siwon want him to see everything? Did he want him to get more confused, or did he want to avoid that? Before Kibum had the chance to decide, the apartment door opened. It seemed to have only taken Siwon maybe five or ten minutes, but Kibum wouldn't have complained.

Kibum noticed Siwon had a bundle in his arms, of course he would smile. He already knew what was going to happen and what precious thing the older male was holding in his arms. Siwon walked towards Kibum with a bright smile on his face. Now, they were sitting beside each other looking down at the most precious thing to them.

"Kiwon, _our _child." Siwon whispered. Kibum could only smile brighter and sweeter. This felt amazing. He was looking down at his own child, this felt too good to be true. "Do you want to hold him?" Siwon asked.

Kibum nodded and whispered, "Of course." 

Siwon handed Kiwon to Kibum carefully, and of course like any mother would, Kibum held his child securely in his arms. Kibum had tears of joy coming down from his eyes. He couldn't help but feel as if this being the most best day of his life. This was one of the best ever since he's woken from the hospital. He felt like he was in heaven. He didn't know or remember he had a son at all, which made him feel so sad, but having his child in his arms...the sadness was washed away from the happiness being welled up in him more.

The child he didn't know he had was now in his arms. He didn't want to leave—he wished he could just stay like this forever. He didn't want to leave his child or husband. He didn't want to leave his home, or the memories either. He wanted to stay. But he had to leave, before anything could stay permanent. He needed to know and remember his past a bit more. He needed to try to remember everything he forgot. 

Everything that's been erased...he had to try and remember. 


	14. Goodbye and Hello

Kibum had felt the need to do something. He felt as if he needed to do something important. He had left his shared apartment to get to his destination. He wasn't sure if he should be doing this; he felt as if he'd feel a bit remorseful after doing such thing. He hadn't told anyone what he was going to do, but by what he'd heard...he needed to do this. For the sake of Siwon, Kiwon, and himself. He felt at least a bit of confidence flow through his system, but there was more nervousness.

He looked up at the home in front of him. He took a deep breath. He was confident, he had to be. He was doing this for a good reason. But it's not like he'd enjoy this. He walked towards the doors and let his knuckles pound on the hard wood. 

Mr. Oh had answered. He moved away from the doorway and smiled, "Master Kibum your parents have been wondering—" Kibum didn't want to, but he just barged in the house and let his eyes scan around to find the two people he was here to see. He barged into the living to find his parents sitting down on the couch drinking tea from white glass cups while they were still in the clothes they had worn for the wedding. 

"Oh Kibum dear, what a surprise to see you? We knew you were with _him_, luckily you escaped." Mr. Kim said with a tone full of happiness.

"Indeed, if you were gone for twenty four hours, we would've called the police and file a restraining order." Mrs. Kim added on to her husband's words.

"I've made my decision." Kibum whispered clearly, butloud enough.

"Your decision? Are you _finally_ going to leave those friends of yours? Oh, are you finally going to forget about Siwon?" Mrs. Kim asked with a smile.

Kibum placed his hands on his hips and walked in front of his parents and looked at them directly. He didn't have a smile, or would. He hated the words that came out of their mouth. How dare they? Even though they deserved this, he didn't enjoy this or want to do this. He didn't look sad. He needed to do this and he wasn't going to backj out now. He looked as serious as ever.

"I'm going to leave. Not my friends, not Siwon...I'm leaving what I had been told was right. I'm leaving...the people that I thought I could trust. I'm leaving...what I had left once, I'm leaving...my parents." Kibum said with a clear and louder voice. 

Before Kibum knew it, he was in his room. There were boxes on top of each other, stacks were on top of the bed. The used to be full closet that were full of his clothes and shoes and other accessories; it was just an empty closet. 

A soft knock came from the outisde of Kibum's bedroom door. Kibum walked towards the door to grasp the handle and open the door. He had expected it to be his parents who would beg for him to stay, but to his surprise, it was Mr. Oh. He had something shiny in his hand.

"Hold out your hand," Mr. Oh said.

Kibum raised an eyebrow, but did as he was told. Mr. Oh placed a silver ring on his hand. "What is this?" He noticed engraved writing on the ring.

"Your engagement ring." Mr. Oh responded.

"Huh, engagement ring? From Minho?" Kibum asked.

Mr. Oh shook his head, "Master Choi Siwon."

"Master?" Kibum asked.

"I used to work for his family. Your parents took the ring while you were sleeping." Mr. Oh explained.

"Thanks...for giving it to me." Kibum said.

"You're welcome. Just a note, touching, looking, or even thinking about things could fill that head of yours with the lost memories. The things your parents gave you, or what Minho gave, or just pictures...can also reveal memories or feelings you had during those times. You might've been thinking about _him _when you were with Master Minho." Mr. Oh explained.

Kibum smiled and nodded. Mr. Oh smiled brightly and spoke softly, "Goodbye, young master Kim. You will be missed a lot." 

Kibum's smile widened and got brighter. "I'll miss everyone too." Mr. Oh walked away. Kibum closed the door and locked it. He placed the ring on his ring finger which had made him smile and made him feel different. Happy. 

He remembered he had felt something missing. Now, that void was filled. Even there were no memories in his head yet from the ring, it felt good having it on once again.

He walked towards a box that sat on top of a chair that went with a desk. It was already open. He took out a picture of him and Minho. By the dark background, he could tell it was during nighttime and they were walking pass someone. It was a man who looked pretty young—around the same age as him. He noticed he was looking at the young man.

Kibum figured out who it was. He could tell by the way they had looked at each other. It was Siwon. He saw the shock from his expression in the phoyo. He tilted his head with confusion flowing his heart and mind. Why had he been shock? He wondered to why he was with Minho to begin with if Siwon and him...if they had so much history together?

Before he knew it, he was back with Siwon. Siwon had told him that he could stay right after Kibum had asked him if he could literally. Siwon had sat beside Kibum—wanting to ask him questions about where he had gone and not to be rude, but to know why he was wanting to stay there and not with his parents. He was loyal, nice, and a caring person so he wouldn't mind if Kibum stayed (that's his wife), but he was also caring enough to know if Kibum was okay.

"If I may ask...and not to be rude or anything, why are you staying here and not your parents' house? Did they kick you out or something?" Siwon asked softly.

Kibum took a deep breath, "I needed to talk to them, I had to. I couldn't let them get away with what they did. I couldn't let them run free. I couldn't let them run free without some kind punishment. I decided they'd be the part of my life I'd let go forever." 

Siwon couldn't believe his wife's words. Kibum was telling him that he had left the two people who tried to split them up for good. He was happy, but couldn't help but feel guilty. His wife didn't have parents anymore, while he did. Kibum didn't have supporting parents, unlike him.

He felt that it was his fault for splitting up a family. Yes, he thought it was his fault for Kibum leaving his parents. But he felt at least happy that Kibum realized what his parents had done. He was happy that he realized that he knew his parents had caused trouble in their relationship. 

"You're not living with them anymore?" Siwon asked.

Kibum nodded, "Yes. But if I'm a burden, I'll—" 

Siwon placed a hand on Kibum's, "You'll never be a burden to me. Don't you know who you are? You're my wife, and the mother to me child...I love you and I _want _you to stay." 

Kibum looked into his husband's eyes and couldn't help but smile brighter. He had realized how close they were. Very close. For a while, he had realized how close they were...he finally realized that it wasn't even how close they were. Siwon had leaned closer and closer. 

By Kibum's surprise, Siwon had leaned even closer, and before Kibum knew it, Siwon's lips were locked on his. Kibum felt his heartbeat fast like a drum being drummed. He knew he was blushing by now.

He remembered this feeling. He could remember being kissed. He also remembered being kissed by someone and having it feel...**_right_**. The unbearable pain that hit his head when he remembered...pieces, part, or even the full memory. 

Even though the pain hurt, he had no desire to stop the little scene going on right now. He shut his eyes and held the pain, and found himself kissing back. He didn't see darkness when he had shut his eyes. He saw two figures kissing each other with their eyes closed. But it wasn't just one memory he saw; he saw many just flashing in his vision and head.

He saw two teenage boys were kissing, a young boy kissing another young boy's cheek...he realized it was memories of him and Siwon. He remembered how many times they kissed and how old they were during those times.

He felt happy that he was remembering. He felt _happy _knowing that Siwon's and his feelings were something real and not just fake, not only that...but the feelings were really strong.

He opened his eyes to realize they were no more just kissing each other, but making out. Even though they were making out right now, they still had their clothes on, but the kisses were a little more aggressive than innocent.

It was when they heard the apartment door open and their friends entered, was when they stopped.

"Hello Bummie and Horsey! How are you two lovebirds?" Heechul was the first one to greet them.

"Hello Chullie, I'm doing splendid, you?" Kibum responded a little nervously since he wondered if anyone had figured out what him and Siwon had been up to.

"Good." The cat diva replied.

"I'm going to be a DAD! I'll be a DAD IN NINE MONTHS!!!" Donghae shouted cheerfully. 

"How are you dealing with him Hyukkie? Or you still standing?" Siwon asked the annoyed and sick looking monkey.

"You wouldn't believe this...my stomach is not even visible yet and he already started buying stuff—not only that we don't even know the gender." Eunhyuk said.

"So? Every couple does that. It's not a surprise that Hae or any couple would do this. They decide to leave home, go to the store, and buy stuff for the baby together!" Ryeowook said with a smile.

"But that's just it! He already bought stuff!" Eunhyuk shouted.

"You can't be surprised—he's a babo, of course he already bought everything. But then again you're lucky." Heechul said.

"Oh and why is that?" Eunhyuk asked the Princess Heenim.

"He _bought _everything. You don't got to pay a dime, now do you? It's kind of all free since it's not coming out of your pocket." Heechul said with a confident smile.

"Well congrats, Hae and Hyukkie! You two will parents—two amazing people starting a family." Kibum congratulated the couple. 

"Thanks Bummie!" Donghae said with an even brighter smile.

"So how are you two? Horsey told us about you knowing almost everything Bummie. Surprising, isn't it?" Sungmin said.

"Very," Kibum said.

"It'll take a while to get used tom" Siwon paused and grabbed a hold of Kibum's left hand, "we're going to try and everything will go well."

"Well goodbye to hiding and hello to freedom." Leeteuk said.

Kibum knew this would take a while, but he was willing to go back.

For him.

For his friends.

For Kiwon.

For Siwon.


	15. Children

5 Years Later......

Running was being heard by four young kids. They were screaming their heads off with joy and laughter. They were running inside of a house and they were lucky to be running on carpeted floor.

They ran into a white room with white items. They all sat down on a long white fluffy comfortable rug and busted into joyous happy laughter as they all looked at each other.

“Kiwon hyung! Why do you always loose?" One of the boys from the four asked the boy who sat in the middle.

“I didn't loose! You all were too fast!" The five year old Choi Kiwon complained.

“Uncle Fishy is always happy and hyper! Even when he spends time with you Eunhae!" A little girl with the resemblance of a particular angel with familiar raccoon eyes exclaimed.

“Kiwonnie, where is Sibummie? Uncle Horsey and Uncle Kibum told you watch over her!" Another little girl said as she took a couple of glances at her light pink polished nails.

Kiwon gasped and placed his hand over his mouth, “Omo! She's only two and I don't know where she is?!"

Eunhae spoke with a high pitched voice, “Are they going to get mad because we lost her?"

The girl who was looking at her polished nails smacked the boy's head. “Of course! How old is she? Two!" 

“Shouldn't we go find her then?" The girl who looked like an angel asked.

Kiwon nodded his head and responded to the girl, “You're right, Soo Young! But...where would she be?"

Kim Soo Young, the daughter of Kim Kangin and Leeteuk tilted her head and thought hardly, “Perhaps...outside?"

The only daughter of Hangeng and Heechul, Han Kyung Hee the twin of Han Han Chul, stopped looking at her nails, “Oh! Oh! Maybe she's in the garden!"

Lee Eunhae, son of Lee Donghae and Eunhyuk stood up too and nodded his head, “She likes to look at the flowers! She always collects peonies, roses, tulips, and daisies and gives them to our pretty uncles!" 

Kiwon nodded in agreement. Ever since his baby sister learned to walk, she always collected pretty flowers from anywhere that had flowers.

“Lets go before anyone finds out that we weren't watching her!" Kiwon said.

It wasn't long until the group of children ran out of the room of white. The Choi family had moved out of their apartment after little Kiwon had turned two and now he was five. The Choi's (Siwon and Kibum) missed the apartment, but they didn't necessarily sell or move out of it. Siwon's parents had bought it for them; a gift for their grandchildren just in case they needed a place to stay when they were older.

Of course, Eunhyuk had given birth once the nine months was up and the couple were blessed with a healthy beautiful baby boy whim resembled his father but acted like his mother. Th couple had thought of the names: Eun Dong, Dong Hyuk, Hae Hyuk, Hyuk Dong, Dong Eun, and there were many more. 

Eunhyuk suggested they name their first child “Eunhae" since that was their couple name which Donghae was completely fine with as long as they named their second child, “Dong Hyuk" or “Hae Hyuk" since he was the top and semi in the couple.

It wasn't long until the others were expecting children. Kangteuk had been the next couple and they were blessed with a beautiful baby girl with her mother's features with her father's eyes. They had named her, “Soo Young." 

It was the Hanchul couple that were also expecting near the time Kangteuk were. Kim Soo Young had been born December 21st and the Han twins were born January 2nd.

The only couples left were Yewook, Kyumin, Zhoury, and Shindong and Nari. Kyumin would be expecting since three weeks ago Sungmin started throwing up and after he came from the doctors, he claimed that he was expecting. Yewook were thinking about it just the same as Zhoury, and Shindong and Nari were still dating.

But no matter what, love was in the air, but it probably wouldn't be long before they would be getting married and be expecting the next nine months to be emotional but beautiful and worth it.

As for the little female replica of the Kim Heechul, had been correct. There was a little girl who looked very adorable was in the green garden full of flowers. 

She had short black hair, her parents' light skin, her Appa's eyes, and her Eomma's eyebrows. Her parents were very attractive looking, so it was no surprise that her brother or her would be good looking as them.

In her small little hands were the finest picked light pink peonies. She was in Herr family's garden. This was where she spent most of her time. She loved flowers. Her favorite were peonies since people usually preferred roses, tulips, or daisies. 

By her surprise, she was lifted from the ground by her strong and manly Appa. He had her in his two arms and placed a soft kiss on her cheeks. He smiled brightly and chuckled lightly.

“Dear, where is Kiwonnie? Isn't he supposed to be watching you? Me and your Eomma told him to do—"

Four children were behind Siwon and Sibum. Kiwon had cut off his Appa.

“I'm right here Appa!" Kiwon called out which made Siwon look back and quirked his eyebrows. 

Kiwon cleared his throat, of course kids wouldn't tell the truth once they've been caught, and since he was a kid, he didn't feel like telling the truth now, “Um...well, you see...there are too many children in this house right now so—" 

“There are only five kids and you couldn't keep track of one?" Siwon asked. 

Kiwon frowned and nodded his head, “Mian, Appa."

Siwon placed Sibum down and ruffled his son's hair and whispered, “Trust me Kiwonnie, there will be much more children soon."


	16. Remember Me

Once again, the season where white soft watery but frozen specks came down from above and piled ontothe Earth. This season was where people were both happy and sad. Children were messing around and playing in the snow or some children were sick.

Choi Kiwon was at school and Choi Sibum were at her grandparents' house while their parents were sitting on a bench at a park. Siwon was wearing more stuff than Kibum. Siwon at least wore boots while Kibum wore regular sneakers.

Siwon was happy and could tell that Kibum was too. It was pretty sad to not be able to frogive your parents for their horrible mistakes. Siwon didn't want Kibum to hate or not see his parents, but both of them knew it was better if they were outof their lives.

As for Hyuna and Minho, those were problems too. Minho had asked for Kibum to come back to him many times, but of course Kibum rejected. He said no and changed his number even (to avoid his parents as well.) As for Hyuna, she had hired someone to harm the Choi children which was when Siwon had a restraining order on her. Hyuna or Minho haven't came in their lives ever since. 

Right now, they didn't talk. It was silent, but not an awkward type, it was pretty comfortable. There was no awkwardness at all.

During the years, Kibum hadn't said anything about remembering anything. Tiny things, but nothing that big. Like Kiwon's birth or how Siwon and him met—those were lost. Siwon figured that it wouldn't be bad to speak out the memories.

"It started with the winter," Siwon whispered and turned to face his wife, "how we _met_."

Kibum raised an eyebrow, "The winter season? Who approached who?" 

Siwon chuckled deeply, "You did. We were just children in school. I was a lonely kid and you were a boy who looked like Snow White. We spent that day throwing snowballs, making snow angels, and making snow forts. A day of snow. That's how it started."

Kibum smiled brightly, "I'm sorry that...I don't remember. I really wish I could." Siwon took his hand and kissed it. 

He whispered softly, "I'll remember for the both of us, I promise."

It wasn't long until the two took a walk with hands locked together. Like Siwon promised, he remembered for them. He did what he wanted to. He told Kibum about their story. 

"We met on December 1st, it was snowy and I was just alone and that's when you invited me to play with you in the snow."

They were two souls who weren't existing, but _living_, and so their life was just _beginning_. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this ending was pretty sad because Kibum didn't get his memories back, but I chose this ending because a lot of people don't regain their full memory and I thought it was more beautiful to have your lover tell you about the memories you've spent together.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in 2015 on AFF  
XD


End file.
